Mom calls home constantly crying and asking why I put her in there. It's mentally exhausting trying to reassure her that she is there for therapy and once she gets steady on her feets, she'll come home. Mom is 92 and has been hospitalized 3 times in the last year and half. She moved in with me last year and things worked out great. If she can't walk again, I don't know if I can let her come back home. Such guilt over having to make this decision. Even if I decided to bring her home and paid for 24/7 care, the expense would be $13,000 a month. I would only be able to do that for 3 months as mom's money would be spent. I hate having my mom calling and crying to "get me out of here." My sister and I tried to explain that she is in "rehab" but in a few hours she is upset again about being there and constantly talks about how she wished she were dead or wants to kill herself. It's so stressing. Mom has never been one that liked any change or not getting her way. We wonder if this is the dementia or is she mad because she can't get her way. I don't know if I should try and bring her home and when money runs out, then put her in a nursing home.. or would it be even more frustrating getting home and going back. Just so confused and feel helpless.
My mom recently began having Dementia (forgetting things, repeating things, etc.) She is 85 years old and lives by herself. She is very independent and has done everything around her house on her own. She even cut the acre of grass she has, when my husband didn't get there before her. She is very strong willed.
About 1 month ago, she tripped indoors and broke her humus bone in her left arm. They had to put her in the hospital for a week and insert a titanium rod and pins. She was supposed to go straight to rehab, but when we got there, it was horrible. She cried and cried not to be left there. Needless to say, I took her to her home and scheduled therapy to come to her. They came for a while and then ordered her to go to rehab as an outpatient. She has been once, but then her right knee caused her a lot of pain, and therefore they scheduled therapy on her right knee. Now she is saying she is tired of all this therapy mess and she will just stay at home and rot and not go anywhere. Here's the problem. I should have never brought her home from the rehab facility. Second, the outpatient rehab is getting tired of her canceling her treatments, and thirdly, someone has to take her to all of these appointments (my sister and I have full time jobs, and my husband and I already have his dad living with us). My sister is no help at all. I live 1 and 1/2 hours away from mom. She lives 3 miles away!
Does anyone have any suggestions how I can get my mom back into the inpatient rehab facility without having to hog-tie her? I need help! Please.
When my cousin was in a NH, there was one phone, in the lobby, for patient use.
It wasn't very convent for patients to make frequent calls.
I would definitely talk to the NH staff, but I suspect your mother's behavior is emotional manipulation more than dementia. The staff has seen this all before, and they are better equipped to make an evaluation. If it is dementia or depression, they canget your mom on the appropriate meds.