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How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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I have a 70 year old relative I've recently reconnected with. They have pretty bad memory issues from a stroke, moved here to Southern California to live with one of their children. This situation is honestly not ideal for anyone, for several reasons, and I've been listening to their complaints and fears and trying to help as I can. However I've learned from another of their children that this is more than dementia, it is mental illness that goes far back into the sons' and daughters' childhoods. My relative refuses to take the medications that were prescribed in the past, and just continues to make life miserable for all. I've given some advice, such as getting POA and other legal docs in order before incapacity is diagnosed, if possible. There is some, but not a lot of money in the bank, plus SSA income. It's looking like involuntary placement is going to be in the near future, but what kind of facility, and where to start? I did mention an elder law attorney, but the response was rather skeptical. I know this is not my responsibility, but I'd like to help as I can. I've been through some of this before and know how daunting it is. Do any of you have advice?
Definitely you would need a memory care unit they can be found inside of assisted living facilities and the med staff would deal with the other type of mental illness with her drs for medications .
I DO have advice. Stay as far away from this as possible. I don't know what connection you have, whether to this person him/herself or to one or more of his/her children, but keep it down to SYMPATHETIC LISTENER.
If you do choose to intervene in any way then PROMISE me you will not do it without reading the memoir by Liz Scheier called Never Simple. Not a new book and cheap used on Amazon. This is Ms. S.'s story of her attempts LIFELONG as an adult to caregive her mentally challenged Mom. She was a smart woman, enlisted the help of the Social Services network of the entire state and city of New York. ALL TO NO AVAIL.
Dealing with dementia is nearly impossible. Dealing with mental illness IS impossible. And being POA for an unreliable and uncooperative person is a nightmare whereas doing it for a very cooperative and loving senior is only a bad dream. To put it another way, it's impossible. It is in my humble opinion ever so much better to leave guardianship to the state. The legal system will not do anything to help management of a mentally ill adult.
Not everything can be fixed. It is impossible to comb out what is dementia versus what is mental illness, and 1,000 doctors can't help that fact.
I would listen to family, and I would sympathize. I would point them toward APS and wellness checks. The outcome here is not going to be good and you need it not to be in any way your responsibility.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It is legal in the US to be unmedicated for mental illness.
The best thing you can do is provide supports to the children.
Stay as far away from this as possible.
I don't know what connection you have, whether to this person him/herself or to one or more of his/her children, but keep it down to SYMPATHETIC LISTENER.
If you do choose to intervene in any way then PROMISE me you will not do it without reading the memoir by Liz Scheier called Never Simple. Not a new book and cheap used on Amazon. This is Ms. S.'s story of her attempts LIFELONG as an adult to caregive her mentally challenged Mom. She was a smart woman, enlisted the help of the Social Services network of the entire state and city of New York. ALL TO NO AVAIL.
Dealing with dementia is nearly impossible. Dealing with mental illness IS impossible. And being POA for an unreliable and uncooperative person is a nightmare whereas doing it for a very cooperative and loving senior is only a bad dream. To put it another way, it's impossible. It is in my humble opinion ever so much better to leave guardianship to the state. The legal system will not do anything to help management of a mentally ill adult.
Not everything can be fixed. It is impossible to comb out what is dementia versus what is mental illness, and 1,000 doctors can't help that fact.
I would listen to family, and I would sympathize. I would point them toward APS and wellness checks. The outcome here is not going to be good and you need it not to be in any way your responsibility.