Almost ready to get in-home care, just stuck with COVID-19 worries and looking for support. Do you worry about the possibility of caregivers infecting your loved ones?

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Almost ready to get in-home care, just stuck with COVID-19 worries and looking for support. Do you worry about the possibility of caregivers infecting your loved ones?

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I'm working with a great therapist who has now advised me to move forward with hiring in-home care for my mom to lessen my own caregiving burden. He warns me that my mental health is being seriously impacted.

I do trust him. But I just need to hear from you out there - do you worry about the possibility of caregivers infecting your loved ones with covid? The way I and my sister have been caregiving for my mom, this past year, has limited the risk of covid tremendously, especially because we both are so cautious and avoid risks when we are away from my mom.

Bringing in caregivers day and night, because she needs 24-hour care, obviously increases the risk greatly. And I'm stuck on the thinking that I'm putting my mom at risk to save my own rear end.

(I haven't broached the issue yet with my sister, but I fully expect her to push back 100% with covid concerns.)

Well thanks in advance.

Coronavirus Family Caregiver Home Care

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My only experience with Ivermectin was when I had a special needs foster dog. I would have to leave it on my porch in the county i lived in so I could go work at the next county's animal shelter, which is where the dog came from so that it could be saved from euthanasia.

The dog would have massive diarrhea when I was at work. Daily, I got reported on by a neighbor for this and the two counties' animal controls then had to, uh, work that out.

If you don't want to take the vaccine or the monoclonals or plavoxid or anything actually approved, perhaps go with something, anything, safer than ivermectin.

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I don't worry about it much. The trade-off of having help or going insane makes the choice easy. A vax only helps the person receiving it hopefully get a less severe case. They can still get the virus and pass it along. Masks, unless they are N95s, are not very effective at all.

So, I just go with the plan that if we are sick or they are sick, we cancel the session. You can't really expect a caregiver to social distance so....

The other thing is to help keep the person receiving the care healthy with immune boosting supplements and foods, etc. So if they do get exposed to something they will be better equipped to fight it off. And reduce co-morbidities. Diabetes is a big one, IIRC.

Covid is part of our world, just like the flu and the common cold. We have to learn to live with is without worrying ourselves sick about it.

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Great answer without drama. I try hard not to be thinking about Covid.

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Of course the potential of Covid, or anything else transferring, is increased with every person brought into Mom's breathing space! You can't get covid without someone "sharing" the bugs. It's a gamble but, many precautions used right, by "dedicated to avoid giving or receiving viruses" care givers. It's about who has the responsibility to insure everything needed to prevent a sharing of virus (surfaces and air) is in place! Need a mask for Mom? Make sure it's an effective mask and the rules for wearing it are posted for care givers (and Mom) as reminder. Maybe Mom should have a tent with positive flow, temp controlled, filtered air (to positively prevent sharing is probably impossible but, risk drops tremendously when you "know your caregivers" mannerisms away from Mom and trust their 100% intent to keep Mom safe
(look up "safe" in any dictionary. The vaccines available to Americans+ are deemed "safe" by our "leaders" of AMA, FDA etc.
Lookup "vaccine" while you're at it) from potential exposure. You don't want just anybody caring in your home because somebody at the office said so. Be super proactive in the hired workers department so you can relax knowing you have first hand knowledge of "who they are"! A team of several workers who are there for Mom and in it to win it - that's what you aim for - an extended family could be better than family! If that don't work - load the house with cameras so you can keep an eye on Mom from Egypt if you want. Do it before you hire! Good luck to you whatever the choices made!
As far as your doctor goes - if he knows you - best listen! You can't fix things with broken tools. If you're Mom's current main fixer, better get your own fixin in before you break! It can happen to anyone! Some just hang in longer before they break. It's not a hero thing either! How would you want things done for you if in Mom's place? Tell nay-sayers to realize what's at stake here first! How important is Mom in prevention of her getting virus? Dollars are usually the measuring device with time running a close 2nd.
Do unto others
What would Mom say
What would Jesus say
Do unto yourself

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Life is full of risks and decisions where you have to weigh what makes sense vs what doesn’t. For me, the science behind vaccinations makes sense so my family including my 95 year old mother and 96 year old father are vaccinated and all but my mother are boosted. My mother had a lot of swelling and discomfort with the second COVID injection so I am still on the fence about the booster. My primary aide and her family are vaccinated but not boosted yet. They all contracted COVID about two months ago (after being vaccinated), but we did not get it. She was out for almost two weeks. It was probably the omicron variant because their symptoms were mild. It was two weeks because she and I wanted to make sure she was not contagious before returning. I would go out of my mind if I did not have her help during the week so I accept the risk of a non-family member in the house. I require anyone who works here to be vaccinated, wear a mask, and wash their hands frequently. I realize that someday we may find that some or all of those measures were ineffective but for now they seem to be the best defensive precautions so I will continue them as long as my mother is in my house since my responsibility is to do my best to protect her. But, I am not able to take that so far that I try to do it all myself without being willing to let help in. That is just not practical and would be as bad for my health as having COVID.
BTW - I have horses and give them ivermectin for worms twice a year. Dosage amount is critical and it is used in livestock as a wormer. I have never seen anything to indicate any virus killing ability nor have I seen anything advocating use in humans. Just saying…

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The horse dose should be based on the weight of horse.
What's your mom weigh?
Its likely that simple.

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The only thing that will relieve your mind is to give the CG a rapid covid test before each shift. Stock up on them and that should do the trick. Forget about vaccination status, masks and social distancing which is utter nonsense. Viruses don't adhere to 6 foot rules, last I heard.

Good luck

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I mostly agree. But the rapid tests are certainly not perfect. If you don't have enough viral load, you will test negative but could be contagious and could start showing symptoms in a day or two.

It really boils down to accepting the virus as a part of life, because it is not going away.

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You can request FULLY VACCINATED ONLY care givers and they also are required to mask. Good luck 💜

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Vaxxed people are just if not more likely to carry and get and spread the virus than non vaxxed, so don't be silly, even with the mask info! My DD recently caught covid on a plane ride, vaxxed and boosted and wearing an N19 mask to boot. Stop spreading misinformation

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I do. And me and mom stayed pretty much locked down for the past two years. Grocery pickup, masks, no social interaction.

Then she had to go to the hospital, then rehab. She didn't get covid, even though one of the nurses wasn't vaxxed, had a cough that she said was bronchitis, and didn't wear the mask properly. She's now in AL and half the nurses either don't wear the masks or pull them down to talk to her. (Idiots!)

She is vaxxed and boosted, and we'll keep making sure she stays that way. She wears a mask as much as she can, but I think we both found out that we didn't die with all these people around us. We can ask politely people pull up their mask and we can keep ours on. But not living life for two years actually took a tougher toll on both of us than just making sure we take precautions.

I am worried for myself since I'm close to 60 and have some medical conditions.

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Make sure caregiver always wears a facemask, washes hands frequently, and social distances when possible. She won't give anybody COVIID when she follows protocols.

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rosadelima: Imho, you should follow all the protocols set in place by your jurisdiction.

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MACinCT: Thank you for your post.

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Short answer: yes I worry. But..

Longer answer: My LOs have visiting home Aides. LOs are vaccinated. The Aides are vaccinated, wear PPE, are educationed to use hand hygiene, monitor for symptoms & required not come to work if symptoms/ill.

Risks do exists - nothing is completely risk free. Some activities have higher risk than others (eg shower assist where virus is more likely to be aerasoled in humid environment & masks can get wet & therefore lose effectivness).

My view is this;
*Reduce HIGHER risks where you can. *Weigh up the pros & cons of KNOWN risks. *Factor in LIKELY scenarios.
*Consider the TIMEFRAME.

By avoiding ALL non-family home help, this increases the workload onto you & sister. If one of you needs time out then the burden of care falls to ONE person - which is too much. Then emergency home help or respite accom is required - bringing risks + much stress.

Timeframe is important too. There is much difference between short & long term assistance (eg 2 weeks after a sprain, 6 weeks post operation or ongoing daily assistance).

So overall, having a few trusted Aides may strike the best balance.

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This actually happened to me and my 94 yo mother. We are unvaxxed because we have counted the cost and found that it's not worth it - it doesn't keep anyone from contracting or transmitting covid, and the ingredients are unknown. Nevertheless, one of my caregivers had a "little cough" (I didn't notice it and she didn't say anything) and 2 days later she texted me that she was sick and both she and her husband had covid. Within 4 days my mom and I tested positive. So. I found a functional doc who prescribed Ivermectin and had a paramedic come to my home to give us both the Monoclonal antibodies. We were much better within 24 hours. Honestly, there is risk with everything and we could have contracted any type of influenza. It didn't necessarily have to be the one they call covid. She also has physical therapists and nurses who come in and out of the house and they can't stop touching their masks which is unsanitary. But I refuse to live my life in fear and my mother feels the same way. Peace.

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You were LUCKY … this time. FYI Ivermectin is not a treatment for COViD. It is given to animals by vets. My dog took it for an infection and went blind from too high of a dose. The monoclonal antibodies are what helped you. Good luck in the future. You can get COVID more then once. I hope you stay free from future infection.

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There's no question that the risk of covid increases the more people your mother has near her. You can mitigate the risk in several ways: (1) Most important: only have fully vaccinated and boosted caregivers, (2) ask the caregivers always to wear a mask when with your mother, to wash their hands often, (3) keep the windows open when the weather permits, even if only open a crack, good ventilation with fresh air will keep things safer. Consider getting a medical quality air purifier for her room. Medicare may pay for this. (4) have rapid tests in the house and require the caregivers to take a test once a week, or as often as needed to make you (and your sister) feel safer, or to show you test results from tests they have taken elsewhere.

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Check the agency's stand about COVID, whether the staff are vaccinated, mandatory mask & handwashing in your household, for unvaccinated staff do they get tested & how often. I would encourage you to listen to your therapist & get help. If sister balks, just have someone replace your time with her. That would allow you to just enjoy visiting her as you see fit to maintain your mental health. Burnout is very common when caregiving & your therapist recognizes the need for you to have help. Take her advice & do your research for an appropiate caregiver.

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My mother is 101 and lives at home with me as her sole caregiver. We chose a different option for vaccines after I read the limited information available (all from studies in Europe and Israel since our government has elected to not maintain that data) for the extreme elderly - she was not vaccinated and neither was I since I would not risk bringing anything home to her - we have elected to remain essentially in quarantine except for routine trips to the stores, when necessary, and always masked and distanced. I did call the most highly rated home-care organizations early on in the pandemic when I really felt I needed help. The first thing they told me was they do not require vaccinations nor do they test for Covid. I realized that the manner in which these companies operate, you are basically dealing with persons who contract through them, operate from their home and are continuously up close and personal with very sick people. I chose not to hire anyone and that will continue to be my approach. I would suggest to you that when people say "if your mother is vaccinated", it should be OK - carefully review the data which says the older you are, the more at risk you are, even if vaccinated. Then it simply becomes a choice of the risk you are willing to take with her health.

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My mom 85 & aunt 93 have part time caregivers. Family do sit one day a week. All of us are fully vaccinated and wear masks if we go out to eat, church or the grocery store. Mom & aunt are vaccinated.

We are all doing the best we can. There are no guarantees.

You need the help more and that is the priority.

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Life is moving on..........every man, woman and child are at risk. Amazingly, people are still making babies and bringing them into this pandemic; that is life doing what it needs to do. Life and death are the Yin and Yang; get mom her 4th vaccine and get the support you need. Let go and Let God.

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Amen!
You said it beautifully.

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I am not going to tell you what to do. I am only going to share how we have handled caring for our mom during covid. She has dementia, but can still live at home by herself. My sister and I take turns going over everyday to make sure she has meds, clean, make sure we bring meals so she does not cook, etc. Neither my sister or I have limited our activities during all of this. We went out to eat when restaurants were open, went shopping, got together with family who was not living in total fear, but could not see the ones who isolated themselves for over a year. My husband and I have not gotten covid, my sister has not gotten covid and mom has not either. We use hand sanitizer, just like we have before covid to lessen the chance of getting the flu or a cold, sanitize shopping cart handles, just like before. We wear a mask only when required to. One thing we do differently than everyone that I know who has gotten covid is.....we take effective amounts of vitamin D, vitamin C, and zinc., but mainly vitamin D. I am not claiming a cure or a miracle, but some of us in our extended family are vaccinated and some are unvaccinated. Of the ones who got covid, NONE of them were taking vitamin D. Of those of us who have NOT gotten covid, all of us have been taking vitamin D through all of this. Do some research on the effects of vitamin D on viruses. I have now gotten to the place where I ask people often if they have been taking vitamin D. Still, I have yet to find one person who got covid while taking it. I would welcome anyone to post their own personal experience on this.
Bottom line here for you, rosadelima, is that it certainly can't hurt if you make sure you add this to your routine.

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I have not vaccinated, nor worn masks (except when required at parents’ doctor appointments). I have gotten fresh air, daily exercise, taken Vitamins and eaten healthy. My husband (when I was with him) had Covid. I did not. He got the vaccine after. He got Covid AGAIN. More people that I know that got the vax have gotten Covid. We’re all different. That’s why no vaccine should ever be mandated and no one should judge others.

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If your LO is fully vaccinated, Fauci said not to worry. My mom also had a mold case of COVID in 3/2020 while living alone without help beyond me. She was 88 at the time. Having someone there daily for socialization and regular meals is a greater benefit.

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We’ve had 24-hour aides caring for my mom for the past year. Two aides work in 3-and 4-day shifts. The agency and the state requires Covid vaccinations and boosters or they lose their jobs. They also wear masks at times like when a visitor comes. It’s worrisome to a degree as you don’t know who is exposed when they’re not with your LO and Omicron can affect even the vaxxed. But get the help you need. Masks and gloves as well as testing. may ease your worries.

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We all worry about Covid. Just heard yesterday that "The Nation's Doctor" (I am guessing they mean the surgeon general) and his entire family just got covid, and they were quick to say that they are all fully vaccinated and took all other precautions. I think we are seeing that more and more, and are being told now that rather than pandemic we need to see this as epidemic (haven't yet researched the difference) and protect ourselves against severe results, meaning I guess we cannot shut down the world forever, and this is going to be, like the common cold, with us. Hoping we don't get the severe effects we should research and decide what's best for ourselves--for me that means fully vaccinated and taking care in crowded or enclosed places, and on we go with real life. I think Covid-19 in some variation is with us forever now. Its severity will impact elders and the "weaker" ones in the herd, as is true of all disease.
This doesn't mean that we cannot live life, or cannot live a quality life; we just have to accept that we cannot live without some risk.
All of that said, what if you take on all the 24/7 care, and you weaken, and you get covid-19? What if YOU die? What then for your Mom?
You need to make this decision for yourself. I myself would not risk my own life in this when any one of you could at any time get covid-19 from anyone else. Tell Sis you have made your own decision for your own well being, and if she is sad about that or mad about that there is nothing you can do about it, would be my advise.

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No I don't worry about My CNA giving my parent Covid . I would worry more in a NH or ASL . As Long as they wear Gloves and a mask you should be fine .

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Way back before we had Covid I had to care for my mom who had advanced COPD. Back then, just getting a cold could have killed her. We didn’t the best we could and tried to keep symptomatic people away from her but there will always be risks. Covid is here to stay and it’s not going to go away. We all need to quit living in fear. You can have caregivers take a covid test is you are worried and that’s the most you can expect. Hand washing and other things we’ve always done to stop the spread of illnesses will have to do. Your sanity when being a caregiver is very important. I had respite care when I took care of my dad who had dementia. It was only a few hours twice a week but I don’t know how I’d have done it without that. Get the helpers you need and leave the rest up to God.

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I just can’t worry about that, as I have caregivers coming every day to care for my wife. My alternative is putting her back into a facility where she had contracted Covid in the past. Now she’s home where only caregivers and myself are near her (and family). I feel it’s much better now. We all have expiration dates, so I look at it as I did my best, and let the chips fall where they do.

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I’ve been living with and caring for my mom since March 2020 while holding a stressful full-time (remote) job and dealing with serious health issues of my own. I chose to hire agency help for 2 hours every morning and evening and it has saved my sanity (somewhat 😬) and probably my life. As others have said, home healthcare agencies do not have to require that their caregivers be vaccinated, although ours requires weekly testing. We have four regular caregivers that rotate in and out and only one is vaccinated/boosted. Three of the four have had COVID (including the vaccinated one). Two were symptomatic and one was not. My mom is vaccinated and boosted. I require all the caregivers to wear masks at all times (my mom does not wear one). Fortunately both my mom and I have remained healthy, but either way it’s a risk that was absolutely necessary for me to take. I am convinced that my health issues were brought on or at least exacerbated by the stress of the last two years and only wish I had made the call sooner. Obviously everyone’s situation is different but I thought I would share our experience. Please take care of yourself and I wish the best for you and your mom!

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I have had good luck with caregivers, both through an agency and privately.
Having consistent, caring people coming in has lightened my load in caring for my husband. Have had one issue where caregiver was exposed but came back quickly after testing negative.

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You are your own best advocate and you deserve a break. In fact, your own health depends on it! COVID isn't going away anytime soon. I spent nearly 2 years caring for my own parents during COVID and we had 5-6 different Hospice team members in & out of our home every week. They took precautions to mask or (in some cases) double-mask upon request. Many confessed that they were not vaccinated.

You can hire a Certified Nursing Asst (CNA) through an agency, but be aware that many agencies do NOT require COVID vaccinations for staff. Ask to see the agency's written staff policy for COVID protocol as this is what the employee is required to follow. In your own home, you can certainly mandate that the caregiver wear a mask and eat at a distance. I set up a caregiver handwashing station, complete with antibacterial soap, paper towels, spare gloves, and a trash can with a lid. I also used a spray disinfectant after each person was done with their shift (overkill, some would say). Ask for a regularly assigned CNA to reduce the number of people that your mom will be exposed to.

The alternative is to go private care and you can require a copy of the CNA's vaccination card and regular testing as long as you notify the person - in writing - before hiring them.

By bringing in help, you're taking care of everyone's health while increasing your own quality of life. Go for it.

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Wow thanks so much. Really helpful advice!

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Read this story from the Atlantic on the topic: https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2022/02/home-health-care-covid-vaccination/622029/

As you feel strongly about this, don't sign any contract (agency or indy) that doesn't guarantee that every caregiver be vaccinated. Ask for proof of vaccination for anyone new.

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Hi Rosa,
I totally understand your concerns. My younger brother has TBI, (Traumatic Brain Injury), and he has lived with me and my husband for the past 4 years. He is 51, and I am 56. We have been extremely careful not to put him in any health danger as far as the Covid Virus. Just when we bagan to look for hired support for him, Covid hit.
We are finally hoping to get him back to his three times a week gym workout since the virus is really down in our area. My only break is when he is at the gym.
It is very difficult to have taken the responsibility for a family members safety and care. I hope you are finding ways to get breaks. I find that even the short recharges can help me be more patient with the responsibilities of a caretaker.
Hopefully your area is seeing the same decline in Covid numbers and you can get some support.
Take care

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We've had caregivers for 10 years and round the clock through Covid the last several years.

Most of my caregivers get tested on their other jobs several times a week. Most of our caregivers have had covid over the last 2-1/2 years. Most of our caregivers are vaccinated and boostered.

Is your Mom vaccinated and boostered?

We require the caregivers to wear masks and do a temp check upon entry. They can remove their masks to eat and drink if more than 6' away from Mom.

There are risks to everything in life. A loved one is at risk for covid in the home, in a care home, in a nursing home, in assisted living and in the grocery store.

Do your best to mitigate the risk.

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Thanks, that's helpful to think about, that they wear masks and eat/drink at a distance. Do you think that I can request weekly covid tests before their shift, if I provide the tests??

Yes my mom is totally vaccinated and boosted. But gee, covid is so sneaky; my older daughter just cancelled her wedding because her two children just tested positive, despite vaccinations.

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Almost ready to get in-home care, just stuck with COVID-19 worries and looking for support. Do you worry about the possibility of caregivers infecting your loved ones?

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