My mom died yesterday before I could get to the hospital. She had been in the ER for 3 days and was not lucid nor coherent during that time. I am her emergency contact and was not contacted until she has been there for 3 days. I started making arrangements to get to her and she died before I could get there. Had I known 3 days earlier, I might have been able to be with her before she passes away. How could they wait 3 days before letting me know?
I think it is easy to believe that our loved ones linger around us in the spirit, until they move out to the universe. I talked to my dear mother for a while, then she drifted away. Try to move towards peace for yourself and her.
May God guide you and give you strength and peace during this difficult time.
I think that her AL dropped the ball when you were not notified. It won't change your situation but, you should follow through with filing complaints so, hopefully, another family will be spared.
Whomever dropped the ball here it was dropped and badly. You can't even know how she was doing, was she comatose. I myself would access those records with help of a Lawyer, would need to know what was happening to her.
There is no way to address this but through JCAHO, Joint Commission on Accreditaion, by mail. The circumstances as briefly and fully as you can. There is no malpractice suit here at all, but you were badly let down and so was she and I could not be sorrier. Please speak with the admin at her nursing home.
My bro was taken to hospital by EMT from his ALF; I was notified before he left. I could not be sorrier this happened to you. I am so sorry for your loss.
Your profile says that mom was in Assisted Living. When my mom was in a facility and she was taken to the ER, it was the facility that reported to us, not the ER.
Believe me, they really want to find the next of kin or medical PoA or Medical Representative because they don't want to be making end of life treatment decisions in the dark. Without a legal spokesperson the doctors are obligated to provide more heroic treatment measures that may not be wanted by the patient and only serves to prolong death, not really productive in the end. They don't want this for their patients but they are obligated to do it. May you receive peace in your heart as you move through your sorrow and grief.