I have recently callad APS for neglect and abuse on my mom from my sister who is POA, or claims to be. I've also made a complaint against her with SSI for misuse of funds. I am my mom's fulltime care giver, and my sister abuses her, denies her medical attention, has spent all her ssi beefits. My mom is not competant by no means, but for some reason my sister does not want her deemed legally incompetent. I want to get secondary POA and I'm told my mom has to be deemed incompetent, so how is my sister able to? What motive does she have to keep my mom from medically being deemed incompetent? I recently called APS and they came to investigate my reports of abuse and neglect and let my sister, the accused, answer for my mom. How she was even able to be in the room was was unbelievable since my mom has told me repeatedly she fears my sister. I am my mom's full time caregiver, and I know she cannot do anything for herself. APS did not ask for proof of poa, or look into anything else when they asked my mom if she could or couldn't do things, my sister answered for her. I was not able to ask them questions cuz I'm not poa, and even had me leave the room to ask my mom, but get answers from my sister, and they deemed her competent and will not investigate further, after only a 15 min visit. Does anyone understand this?? Don't they usually look at or need proof of poa document?Please help my mom and me understand how this happened? I contacted Regional APS and was told to contact the supervisor of the agent that came and ask my concerns, and why, because the agent that was here would not answer anything. This is madness, pls help me to help my mom.
Your sister is providing care for your mother. It would be good now if you would lend support. Apologize to your Sister and be there for her, helping with Mom's care in any way you can. THIS will put you on the scene, something that you were NOT, I assume, when APS visited. I don't know where you got the information that the sister answered for Mom. APS almost always interviews the Senior and the person accused separately so that the senior can say what they wish. You cannot have been there, yet you tell us this was not done.
I also very much doubt, as you were not there, that you have any idea what documents they saw. If your Mother is indeed competent, then she can make you the POA any time she wishes to.
It is my feeling that you will soon be utterly unwelcome in the home of your Sister. I do know if I were caring for my parent, trying to provide all they need and doing financial and medical POA work as well as 24/7 care that you would not be welcome in MY home.
We cannot know your Sister's side of things. We DO know that you have done what legally you are able to do, because you have told us so, and told us that APS has told you there is no case here.
Sibling wars tear aging elders in half. It is like being drawn and quartered when you are too old and weak to fight back. It is a weak spot for me, so forgive me if, on this your third or fouth posting, I seem cranky. There quite honestly is nothing anyone on the forum can do but tell you that we are sorry for your pain. And I am.
So the answer to your question is multiple people can hold a POA for one person and even for multiple purposes, the only thing that makes it kick in is that it is signed notarized and exists. However if you are talking about a DPOA or jumping POA then yes the person has to be deemed officially incompetent by whatever requirements are set in the document. Now to further confuse things there are also MPOA (medical power of attorney) and health care proxies which cover medical care not financial business. As your mother’s primary caregiver it’s a little surprising you don’t have any of these things, are you the one that takes her to doctors appointments? If so perhaps they have you on record at least as medical proxy or granted access on HIPPA paperwork on which case you should be able to discuss her medical situation and living situation with her doctors who should help if indeed she needs care she isn’t getting or is in danger. I’m also curious why you leave your mom alone with your sister if your mom is so afraid of her and mom lives with you. I mean your sister has to come to Moms residence which is also yours to visit, care for, see mom so while it isn’t ideal you could just make sure you are always present, right?
That is the simplest solution I can think of.