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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
polarbear that's basically what I have to do at times. After 2 ambulance trips to the hospital in less than a year I told the senior if you knew what you were doing you would not have had to go the hospital ER instead walking into your own doctor's office. I think it's about control as much as anything. Part of the issue is that they are from a generation that relied a doctor, pill or procedure for everything and didn't have to pay attention their daily routine including diet, nutrition etc.
I can't get the senior here to take vitamins for which he was prescribed(over the counter strength vitamins). It's a form of control and they rationalize by with it being their health-which it is but they should not be complaining about their issues then. Nor complain about the bills, doctors office waiting rooms, home care barking about privacy etc.
Tell her it's her choice to not take meds, eat, or follow doctor's orders. When she becomes sick and frail enough, she will be put in a nursing home where the nurses will fuss over her all day.
When I was caring for Mom at home, she would take whatever attention she could get. She would crave unhealthy food (she is obese and diabetic), so she would "urgently" call other people (who are not caregivers & didn't know her diet) and would convince them that I was not allowing her to eat & those people would bring her fast food - which she was not allowed to have. She would make frivolous calls to emergency services when she was alone in order to get attention. It's a little disconcerting when the 911 responders know your family member by name. That's how often she called them. When her child from out of town came in to supervise her for a weekend, she decided to develop "symptoms" which led her child to call 911 and have her picked up. She would call the pharmacy to renew scripts which she was no longer supposed to be taking & then I had to straighten all that out. She would seek attention by trying to make financial transactions that she was no longer competent to make on her own & then I'd have to straighten it all out. She would not do her prescribed restorative exercises & then would play the "oh poor me, no one understands" routine as she got progressively weaker and had continued falls. She never lost her desire for drama and the "me, me, me" - when she should have been working REALLY hard trying to stay independent. she's now in a nursing home, but constantly claims she can "go to an apartment" any time she wishes. Yeah, right. This isn't a dress rehearsal - this is reality. Sorry if she didn't understand that while she was still in her own home & not yet in a nursing home. She should have been making things work while the option was still there.
Hi Rocki No. I have not had that experience. I have had and known elders to not take meds but not to get attention. Most people do not want to go to the hospital...for any reason. But if your mom is doing this I would suspect cognitive decline and consider the suggestion to get her the proper testing. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be doubting her if you found she had psychiatric issues although I do understand how trying it can be. Perhaps she feels something is wrong and is doing all she knows to get help for it, not realizing that it’s a mental condition ( if it is) or how to help herself. It’s hard for us to realize that if our joints are achy or her skin is wrinkled or maybe we have gallbladder or heart issues that we can also have something wrong with our brains. The brain can work most of the time like our achy joints can work most of the time but be impaired just enough to not be able to think properly or reason out that the course of action to skip meds and go to the hospital is faulty. Maybe one way to assess this a bit for yourself is to think back on her previous actions. Has she always wanted more attention than others. Has she always wanted to go to the hospital? Has she always refused needed medication?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I can't get the senior here to take vitamins for which he was prescribed(over the counter strength vitamins). It's a form of control and they rationalize by with it being their health-which it is but they should not be complaining about their issues then. Nor complain about the bills, doctors office waiting rooms, home care barking about privacy etc.
Tell her it's her choice to not take meds, eat, or follow doctor's orders. When she becomes sick and frail enough, she will be put in a nursing home where the nurses will fuss over her all day.
No. I have not had that experience. I have had and known elders to not take meds but not to get attention. Most people do not want to go to the hospital...for any reason.
But if your mom is doing this I would suspect cognitive decline and consider the suggestion to get her the proper testing. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be doubting her if you found she had psychiatric issues although I do understand how trying it can be.
Perhaps she feels something is wrong and is doing all she knows to get help for it, not realizing that it’s a mental condition ( if it is) or how to help herself.
It’s hard for us to realize that if our joints are achy or her skin is wrinkled or maybe we have gallbladder or heart issues that we can also have something wrong with our brains. The brain can work most of the time like our achy joints can work most of the time but be impaired just enough to not be able to think properly or reason out that the course of action to skip meds and go to the hospital is faulty.
Maybe one way to assess this a bit for yourself is to think back on her previous actions. Has she always wanted more attention than others. Has she always wanted to go to the hospital? Has she always refused needed medication?
Have you asked for a psychiatric evaluation?