He is 89 years old, good physical health and takes very little medication. He has been taking medication for his memory for about 7 years. He know me and a few of our friends and business partner. Recently he has started to sleep a lot and refuses to eat much and drink. It is hard to get him to drink, as he is laying down. He seems happy and smiles at me, and he can walk to the bathroom, however he is using Depends and should use a walker. He has lost about 8 pounds in the last 6 months and appears to be continuing. Not skinny, but about 5'5" and 158. My concern is if I let him dictate his wishes to not eat, and he looses more weight, will I be considered neglecting him. I am able to look after him as I do not work outside the home and several years younger then him. He saw the doctor last month and She noted his weight loss and didn't seemed alarmed. I have tried to be creative in feeding him. I hand feed him fruit and breakfast cake when he is bed, and can usually get him up in the early evening for a small meal and ice cream. He has never drank water, so it is coke or orange juice. I don't want to fight with him about eating and drinking and it is very difficult to reason with him about the advantages of going so. He doesn't seem to have much strength and not eating isn't helping. He has a health directive, but at what point does one follow it?
Take care of yourself, too.
Carol
Keeping up his weight may improve the quality of his life, so if he is willing, give him high-calorie foods. My husband liked milk shakes, sometimes with bananas or berries, always with ice cream. He also liked scrambled eggs with cheese.
One thing concerns me, and that is feeding him while he is lying down. Choking and aspirating food is a high risk for persons with dementia. Having him sit up as straight as he can while he is eating is safer.
As others have said, as the body shuts down there is less and less interest in food and more and more sleeping. I called in hospice when my husband's sleep pattern reached 20 hours a day.
Try to ease off of that and substitute with something more healthy. Since he likes OJ, maybe he'd like cider. It's at least more healthy than the chemicals and water of coke.
I suspect also he may like being hand fed. And not being active could cause a reduction in his appetite. Not eating well is such a complicated factor for the elderly.
Have you tried Ensure Plus or one of the nutritional drinks? We deal with the weight loss issue as well. EP is one of the few nutritional drinks my father likes.
At some time, though, the body begins to shut down, and your husband may be reflecting entry into that stage.
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