she is very resistant and says she doesn't need to go. then, of course, she does. She is always incontinent at night, but it is becoming more of a problem during the day. She just says she doesn't need to go, then she falls asleep, or is just watching tv, and goes. I'm trying to keep her out of assisted living as long as I can, but it's getting really hard.
Good luck!
This is a problem that we too have had with my mother in law. We have started setting her alarm to go off early in the am so she gets up and goes. This has cut way way back on the number of bed wetting incidents. She wears adult diapers max strength at night and med strength during the day. She has not had a daytime wetting incident in quite a while, but she hasn't fallen asleep in her recliner chair in a long while either. She realizes that she has this problem, and she tells us that she does not feel it when she has to go. This may be true since she does it mostly when she is asleep. As far as your wife is concerned, you may have to be up front and very frank with her and discuss that this is a real problem that has to be managed and tell her to get up once an hour or every two hours or whatever and go in and try to go whether she feels like she has to or not. If she can incorporate this into a routine, it would help. I hope this helps.