I am doing some small projects in my mom's outdated bathroom. We are replacing her old round toilet with a taller comfort height elongated toilet seat. I asked the plumber about a bidet for mom. The plumber mentioned that he has also sold a few Kohler bidet toilet seats. (The bidet is in the seat and has a warming function.) I was just wondering if anyone has found this helpful and effective? Mom has vascular dementia and sundowning and finds the hygiene challenging so the aide helps her but it is sometimes difficult. The elongated seat will bring a bit more room. I was just wondering about a bidet. She has never had one.
I watched her daughters struggle physically to transport her from bed or chair to the toilet.
We purposely installed a bidet toilet when making accessiblility modifications to our bathroom.
The brand we purchased is called “Toto” and the product a “Washlet.” It is available as a separately installed seat or as a complete toilet.
It requires connection to an electrical outlet.
My Mom now lives with us. She has dementia, Parkinson’s and is at risk for falls. This toilet has been indispensable in maintaining both her hygiene and her dignity.
She resisted initially. But, as she needed more and more help with toileting, I was able to quietly turn it on while she sat. Now, I hear no complaints.
It has been helpful and sometimes a life-saver in these circumstances:
- When she is too weak to stand in the shower
- When she has had diarrhea
- To prevent irritation and chaffing from urine that leaks (incontinence)
- To preserve her dignity by providing a discrete rinse rather than doing the wiping for her
- When her hemorrhoid becomes irritated or bleeds
- To keep diaper rash in check during the hot summers
- To provide a soothing rinse whenever there is irritation
At this point, I cannot imagine trying to care for Mom without it.
A lower seat keeps the bowels at a better angle making it easier to evacuate.
The grab bar ideas sounds like a good one or the lift.
Also depending on you mom's level of flexibility or dementia a bidet sprayer may be a tad confusing for her.
If she is sharp, why not try it, though.
With the bidet seat you will have to be there and help her with the use and the functions. Also the first few times she may get startled and try to get up and that could present a fall risk. As the dementia progresses she will forget how to use the functions so you will have to continue to be there to help.
The house that my Husband and I moved into was built handicap accessible and both bathrooms have the tall, elongated toilets. I love them. (As a matter of fact when I have to use a "regular" toilet in a public washroom, I feel like I am sitting on a child"s toilet.) Interesting thing the sink in the fully handicap bathroom had an infrared faucet on the sink. I had to remove that because he did not understand how to just put his hands under the faucet to get the water to run. It was frustrating for him. So after several months of trying I replaced the faucet and he was much more able to deal with the hand washing and brushing his teeth.
If there is any way for your mother to "see" the difference in taller, elongated, vs the standard bowl - you might be surprised that she could very-well prefer the standard - as a short woman, I personally hate the taller toilets and really hate the elongated ones.
They do make a toilet-seat-lift so Mom won't have to sit down as far and easier to raise up - but again, this too becomes old rather quickly. My DH had one after his first knee surgery and we tried again recently because at 96 he had too much trouble. He hated it. So I put in Grab Bars all over the bathroom and he's much happier now. Also a "Toilet Surround" that he can use to get up. (think "walker" surrounding the toilet - similar) Much better solution. P.S. he hated the higher, elongated toilets too.
RE: the bidet: go for it. I believe it is an option if you use it or not.
amazon.com/gp/product/B01E4H7DTA/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
It will give us full control of the cleansing so that as she progresses it can be used to rinse a larger area that may be soiled from wearing a diaper. By attaching to the faucet you also have direct control of the temperature of the water.
It was quite an experience and I want one, am saving up for it. But I think it could be disconcerting to an elder.
I'd try to figure out if the person helping her would be able to clean her on the bidet seat. I've never done it, so, I can't say. Can you ask the assistant or CNA what they think? Having the person lay on the bed to be cleaned may be easier. I'm not sure.
I've also read that people with dementia often have an aversion to water. That's why they don't like getting a shower. So, I'd be wary of the bidet if it sprays water.
I hope that you'll get some responses from those who have used these before.