I ask him to always let me know when he has to get up to go to the bathroom, just usually in the morning, he can walk slowly with a walker but does not get around good, might fall. I will leave the room just after he tells me he is okay, (uses urine bottle by the bed only gets up for #2) immediately after I leave the room, I hear him banging around trying to get to the bathroom, when I ask him why he didn't call me, he just stares at me like he doesn't want to respond or doesn't know what I am talking about? Is that dementia, what stages, he just started doing this. Also, just stares at the TV not really watching it but flipping it a lot. Sleeping and not eating saying his mouth is hurting and he can't chew. He always has excuses, seems very defensive about what I ask him?
Best of luck!
With the other issues, it could be that since you were an employee at his business, it could be that he doesn't like having you tell him what to do now that you are his caregiver. Here's an idea, buy some nurses scrubs, or a top to try out, and see if that makes any difference. I noticed that my parents were more apt to listen to a person in a medical uniform then to me.
Then there are some folks who will NOT grow old gracefully. They are angry at the world because they are aging. My Mom was that way. My Dad had a sense of humor so for him growing older was easy.
He hates that he is getting older, no sense of humor there!
I hope you're able to tread water until he sees the neurologist. There is clearly *something* going on, but it wouldn't do to try guessing.
I would put the neurologist in touch with the psychiatrist if you can. Sigh, it would be nice if these specialists would consult without being told to; but they probably won't, and each may have input that will help the other, so it's worth asking.
Are you on his HIPAA list?
Chilli, no matter how hot, wouldn't cause mouth ulcers but it would hurt like heck if there already were some (or other tenderness caused by some kind of infection). If he'll let his PCP do it perhaps a swab might be in order?
His friends are his age and they are hard of hearing, so he is being generous, but clearly does not want them.
Keep a journal until next week's appointment: log the incidents you notice, with time of day and what's happening, to help the neurologist spot any relevant patterns. Was seeing the neurologist suggested by the psychiatrist?
Has he had a hearing test, just by the way?
Nothing to see in his mouth, or related to his teeth?
If there has been a formal diagnosis of some kind of dementia, then yes this could well be a step down in brain function - but I would wait and see, don't get ahead of yourself. Meanwhile I think you can only do your best to prevent risks by assuming that he cannot follow instructions or remember procedures. How are you, are you coping all right? Do you have help from anybody?
He has some problems hearing, but refuses to wear hearing aids, has given them away to his friends, has told me not to get him anymore.
And yes, I think he is having some mouth problems, seems he ate hot chili and it developed sores, dentist prescribed medicine and he (also has hypochondria, paranoia & anxiety has worsen) tells me that the dentist had unclean tools and he got something, It appears to me his mouth looks better, but in his mind it isn't, but then again, I don't know?
I have help once or twice a week or when needed with Right at home, it does relieve a lot of stress.
Thank you for you response, it helps.
Has he been seen by a doctor? Have you been given any medical or psychiatric advice?