Hi and thank you for this page. I took care of my first husband for 10 years, the last 4 years of his life it became very hard because he had grand mal seizures for 3 1/2 hours that paralyzed him, I worked full time and while I was gone I had a nurse.Taking care of my husband was hard but I wanted to do it. During this time my dad and my stepmom helped for a short time, I fixed my home so they move in. My stepmom became very ill and passed away in my home, my dad just left and stayed at my sister's. During which time he got sick, While my first husband was alive I also had to take care of my dad which was very hard!!! My sister won't help!!! :( Right after my first husband passed away probably 6 months I immediately had to start taking care of all my dad's needs. I did remarry and have a wonderful husband that helps so much but, it is beginning to effect both of us and especially me I have been caring giving for 16 years and working full time. My dad has lots of allergies especially corn so his diet is very restrictive, also he can not have gluten. I am so tired and I feel very trapped. I love my dad but I don't know what to do...... I just started counseling yesterday. My dad has a care giver for 4 hours Monday thru Friday, but on the weekends and dinner it is up to us, He has COPD and he does nothing for himself. We are very restricted as to what we can do and I am struggling really bad. Always feeling guilty about how I feel and very sad. Thank you
You will feel guilty when you place him in a NH, but it could be that both you and he will feel better. You can never tell. Try to find him a nice place. I do know that you need a break and your father when he was younger would have understood. I don't know how he would feel about it now or if he is still able to understand. Have you talked to him about it?