I am constantly helping mom, who lives in ALF, try to find her things (purse, wallet, makeup) that she says are stolen. She has Alzheimer's and hides/loses her things daily. Most times I find the "stolen" items in her room. She has several spots she typically uses to hide things but not always. I try to get her to put her things in one spot to no avail. How do others handle this? Any ideas for keeping her things safe in one spot?
People come into the house all the time to shift these items!
A few things that have helped are
*EVIZ cameras (wifi security cams) very reasonable price, see her on my phone
* double "fake" purse ie keys, change, lipstick (not red!)
*Buy bulk...pens, toothbrushes,
*locked her wardrobe
*Lock box for myself
A sneaky spot for only mum to keep her treasures. ...The dryer! She loves it- no thief would think to look there!
So a fake set of valuables is great. The real ones are in a locked drawer.
Perhaps the elderly person could have a locked drawer also, with a key on a lanyard, or on a wrist band, for their own hiding needs.
*I had a preschooler with anxiety who needed to hold onto a pair of toy whales while at school. If another child got then he would cry uncontrollably. I let him hide the animals in his cubby. All the stressful behavior and conflict went away.
During her 10 years it was common for things to go missing. She either hid stuff on purpose or misplaced by accident. I hated spending my visiting time looking under and over everything for something missing. Eventually i learned where the prime spots for hiding were. I miss my mom but i don't miss all the confusion. My mom was never angry/mean during her last 10 years, BUT she was paranoid and believed stuff happened that did not really happen.
I never really figured out how to stop it cause well that's just dementia for ya. Well, the list of different problems we had over the years could write a book.
One of the best things I ever did though... was to have her seen by a Geriatric Dr.
She had been increasing in repeating stories about things that didn't really happen. Being ~overly~ stressed about strangers and robbers and people taking stuff during the night.(like her magazines) Any way it got bad. She got on a low dose of antidepressants and it really helped her out alot. Im not big on drugs, but sometimes they do good. It helped make her more relaxed, like the anxiety level evened out.
Not saying your mom has anxiety or stressed. But when they believe things are stolen, i think there is some fear there. I think the brain isn't functionally correct and its off balance. I hope this doesn't sound bad. Good Luck
There are "tiles" or tags that can be put on items and then they can be found more easily. Like the tags that you put on luggage so you can track where it is.
I would keep duplicates of some things so if you can not find them the item can be replaced right away so that she does not get upset.
It might be time to move mom to Memory Care rather than the Assisted Living.
MC would have a more controlled environment than the AL.
You can not get her to put items in one place
She wants to keep them safe so puts them away. Because of the dementia she forgets where she put them.
We went up to her bedroom to "complete her dressing routine" and following procedure I emptied her pockets in front of her. Cellphone, change, endless tissues. And a cupcake.
Keeping track of where you've put things when your short-term memory keeps cutting out is almost impossible. Does your mother become very upset when she can't find her belongings? - because as long as nothing crucial goes missing, and it's simply a matter of playing hunt the purse three times daily, I should let things be.
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