My brother is the POA for my mother and will not discuss her estate or accounts with me.
Recenty he wanted me to sign and change a deed that I would inherited the house if he died and vice versa. He wanted his wife to get his share if he died and mentioned that my kids would get there share. I called his attorney ask a quick question about the deed.
He received the bill from his attorney and told me that I had to pay 300.00 for the phone call. Lie. Got in touch with the attorney and found out he also talked to her that day and there was a charge for the work and staff. The call was only 45.00 for the call, which I had no idea that I was being charged for to begin with. He has the contract with the attorney. Now you can see he is a lier and his wife ask that I not call their lawyer. Now I know why.
With this being said, I have not paid anything and blocked him.
I can’t imagine what he is doing with my mom's account. My mom is 93 and lives on her own and dependent on him for groceries. He pays her bills with her money, but not sure what else he is charging her for. I am sure he is charging her for whatever he does for her. He is secretive and someone that will tell half truths but no more. Just plain dishonest.
I live in another state and ask my mom to watch her money, but she really doesn’t know about her money.
This is unfortunate for me because I will have to hire my own attorneys. Estate and Real estate.
If anyone has any other idea what to do, would appreciate your input.
And, he is not obligated to discuss Moms estate or finances with you. He is Moms representative. She is not obligated to discuss these things with u either.
I have read your other posts. You say nothing about Mom being incompetent. If not, the POA may not be in effect and your brother has no say in handling Moms money unless...she has asked him to. There is an immediate POA which gives him the right and then a "Springing" which only is effective if Mom is incompetent.
That would be a question you may want to ask...does your POA give you a right to make these changes? So, the house is being left to you and brother? In the event one of you dies, then the other gets it. Sounds standard to me. Very seldom would it read that a DIL inherits if the Son has passed. It can be written to "trickle down" to the children if one child dies before the parent. But that is not how Mom wrote it. If she wants to make changes, she can. If incompetent, then the Will stands as is. Maybe she doesn't want the DIL to inherit.
As for my mother she had to ask him to be the poa because I am not in the same state. I told her to look at her bank statements, but don’t think she understands if something was not right.
The worst thing is that I am disappointed with his dishonesty including his wife’s after she told me not to call the attorney Knowing I would get to the bottom of the bill. He should of just been honest. He has always been secretive and would never be open with anything. He has Parkinson’s and I think he may also have some mental issues going on, but knows his money. Probably has the first nickel he ever made.
I am to take over the poa if he can no longer make decisions, but hard know that when that will happen because his wife runs everything. My mother is dependent on them, but worry he may be taking advantage of her estate.
Your phone call cost "only" $45 (doesn't it give you pause that we're typing "only" in front of that charge for a couple of minutes on the phone?)
Logging the call will have cost $x
Notifying your brother - they have to, he is your mother's POA - will have cost $x
They probably have other charges too.
I once had a lawyer who sent me a letter by email - how quick and efficient! I thought - and then by fax - oh good, hard copy too, I thought - and then by post. ??? I thought.
And charged for each format, none of which I had specified.
You should see the charge for "perusing"! You write to a lawyer, it costs you money. He writes to you, it costs you money. You expect him to read and think about what you've written as well? - it costs you a LOT of money.
I couldn't afford him for long but I wouldn't have stayed anyway. Such business practice is near the wind but it's not illegal, and it becomes *extremely* expensive very quickly.
Going back to the seed of your suspicions - one, this is about a will. Nothing to do with POA. The deed is probably a deed of variation, altering the terms of the will subject to the agreement of all beneficiaries affected by the alteration. If you've said no, nothing will happen. Calm down.
As is, the will leaves the property divided between the two of you. If you die, your share goes to your brother. If he dies, his share comes to you.
The variation your brother suggests will mean that if he dies, his share will go to his wife; and if you die, your share will go to your children. Again - if you're not happy with that idea, fine, don't sign it and it will stay as it is; but it doesn't sound unreasonable to me and I'm quite surprised you don't agree with him.
Then how he's managing your mother's accounts and bills... was your mother in the habit of discussing her money with you, when she was able to?