He had no business reading private information. I hired a HHA through a consumer driven program. She interviewed at my home, toured the home and saw all situations that needed addressed. She came to work the first day arguing with her drunk husband at the curb. She spoke of his issues and the controlling situation. She worked that day and everything was fine. The next day she sent a text and said she would be here soon , I texted some work instructions. 7min later she texts "my husband read your text and says I can't work for you anymore". Then goes on saying sorry for the inconvenience. Then when I tell her it is a privacy violation for her husband to read our work related text. She tries to change to about 5 different stories. I have all the texts from beginning to end. I have another full time aid for 2 years that has no complaints with the work situation. Should I report her to the agency for this privacy lapse? I am frustrated by my waste of time and stress because of this new aide and the difficulty of hiring process to find a new one.
You were initially angry because this woman let you down at short notice.
In the course of her letting you down she revealed that the instructions you had given her concerning your mother's care had been read by her husband.
You then, annoyed at the inconvenience, brought up the privacy violation.
To which she, no doubt alarmed, responded with nonsensical alternative excuses, further annoying you.
You say she has become aggressive, and later comment that you - I couldn't agree more - do not need to pick up an alcoholic stalker, but do you mean her or her husband? Or are they well-matched?
The thing is, what you have here is an escalation and what you want is to stop it. So, how do you see this unfortunate episode ending, and what outcomes are you aiming for?
Within seconds of of reading that text I responded that that was a violation of the Privacy agreement she signed later after I had a panic attack I did inform her that she had left me in a tough spot so no my aggravation and her not showing up was not did not override my fear of her violent husband. I am lucky that the supervising agency has a specialist in these matters who is understanding and supporting of the feeling of fear and danger for my safety involved and will assist me in filing complaints was HIPAA later this week. I must say I do not understand why people think that I am being vindictive because I have been put in danger by her bringing her lifestyle to my home I was unaware of her living situation when I hired her although she was more than willing to divulge all on Saturday so I don't understand why you guys think that I am filing and retaliation when I got in touch with the agency on the first business day which was Monday today
Look. I do understand the frustration, and I do understand how infuriating it is to feel you've rejected perfectly good candidates in favour of one who has proved hopeless.
But I wouldn't be so pessimistic that your shortlisted candidates won't still be interested if you were to approach them sensitively (try flattery), for one thing; and for another, what more punishment do you want to mete out to a woman who is apparently good at her skilled job but prevented from performing it by her nightmare husband?
Perhaps the best thing, if you can be sure of contacting her privately (I'd suggest a phone call, first confirming that she is free to talk), would be to counsel her a) to GET HELP and b) not to undertake commitments until her personal circumstances allow her to.
I mean, crikey, what if this man had forced his way into your home once your back was turned? There are bigger concerns at stake.
If the HHA won't be working for you anymore I would imagine the agency would be the first to know. But if they are not aware, my suggestion is to just cut bait and move on. If you choose to use the agency again you can tell them at that time so you don't get another unprofessional aide.
All communications should go through an agency. If the HHA was running late she should call the agency to tell them and then the agency can call you to let you know. Only in very specific situations should communication be directly between the aide and the client's family, such as if an aide has worked for you for a period of time and there is trust established over time. And only then the private communication should be brief. And even that's a slippery slope.
Many of the CNAs I meet at Moms NH are in similar vulnerable situations at home. When I complained to the Director about short staffing, he shared with me that abusive situations at home is the 2nd leading cause of staff turnover. (Calling in for lack of childcare is the #1 cause for dismissal) Sad because many of these women are excellent caregivers if given the chance. So if I were to call the agency, I wouldn’t zero in of the phone privacy issue as much as her husbands refusal to let her work. I hope you find another caregiver that has more stability.
And if the drunk husband was driving, tell the police.