Since moving my mother here it's been constant caregiving on my part...she wants to be in every room with me, wherever I am in the house, that is where she wants to be. I find that it is very hard to have any "me" time anymore....anyone have any suggestions for me?
I went through this with my mother as her dementia progressed. My mother would almost panic if she couldn't see me, and tried to make her feel as comfortable as I could during this stage. As her condition progressed she grew ANNOYED with me when I tried to keep an 'eye' on her. "I'm not a child" she would say, and I did my best to let her have HER space, while still keeping her safe. Then it seemed like "I" was following HER around (how ironic).
To get some "ME" time for yourself, I would find a 'friend' that could come over and visit and sit with your mother, and perhaps have a cup of tea, or coffee and a chat, while you 'go to work'. YEP... I had to LIE to my mother to get the 'me' time "I" needed, but I would tell her I had to go to "work", but Missy will be here if you need anything.
Find someone (even a local respite service) that can provide you with the time you need for yourself. Granny nannies, or a similar service do 'sitting by the hour so you can 'hire' someone to help you. Whatever you do... PLEASE don't introduce them as a 'sitter' Just invite them in as a 'family friend' and then quietly excuse yourself from the room if your mother is comfortable. You may have to 'try' a few people until your mother is comfortable with someone.
Also... a SENIOR care (daycare) center can provide you with a needed break AND your mother will benefit from the interaction with others her own age. Why not try to introduce her to a local one, and take her there for lunch, and then see what her reaction is to the place. So often we don't think our loved ones will WANT to go, but if we don't try we won't know. Oh, and don't try only once! Try more than once, and then ask her what SHE can do to 'help the old people'. :)
Did she have to have to come live with you?
Is it your house?
If is not fair for you to be a prisoner in your own home.
If her doctor does not know she is behaving like this, him or her needs to be told and your mother taken in for an evaluation. This following you around thing could decline to the point she follows you into the bathroom.
If this is due to dementia, i think it is serious time to consider somewhere safer for her to go.
i give her laundry to fold , turn tv on and tell her ohh its good movie !! she will sit and watch it till she notice im gone then she get up and hunt me down .
the only time i got to have me time is when its bed time for her .
my dad cant walk so he is either on his recliner or in his bed , i have no pblm with dad . its my mother in law . she comes stays here once in a while so my brother in law can have some free time too . he cant mow the grass cuz she will follow him around while hes mowing . he tried to get her to sit down and watch him mow , she got mad and threw hot cup of coffee on him .
its terrible . i can only think when u have a me time is when its bedtime .
bless your heart .