Hi all,
My mother's dementia has worsened to a level that she can no longer stay in Assisted Living. We have to move her into a memory care community or set her up in an apartment within a block or two from my brother so he can visit her more readily (he is not able to have her live with him). Mom is physically doing well, except for a recent loss of eyesight in her left eye. She complains of loneliness and has a hard time making friends. But we moved her to assisted living about 6 weeks ago and she's much happier now that she gets out of her apartment to sit with other women for breakfast, lunch and dinner than she was when she was in independent living, eating meals in bed most of the time.
There are pros and cons of both scenarios (memory care or at home care). I've read a lot about home care, but most stories involve someone living with a family member, versus living on their own with round the clock care.
Appreciate any / all advice. Thanks!!
You will need more than 1 caregiver no one can work 24/7/365
You will need more than 1 with a back up plan for when one of the caregivers is ill, wants to take a vacation, has to take the day or week off because their child is sick.
And what happens when your mom gets to the point where she will need 2 caregivers to care for her safely?
Will you be able to find an apartment or condo that was built or rehab done to make it handicap accessible? Wide doorways, no carpet, roll in shower are just a few things that will become necessary when equipment has to be used to move her around.
If mom is happy with community living a transfer to a Memory Care unit would be an easier transition for her. There you will have caregivers 24/7/365 in a facility that was built to accommodate equipment and various levels of care needed to safely care for someone.
Please make sure Brother plays a big part in this decision!
I'm thinking over the last few months, where I have been either in and out of the hospital, ill at home, or just plain trying to recuperate. I have not been able to visit my mother.
If she were being cared for in my home, or even her own, I would shave had to manage the caregivers. Checking to make sure they showed up, are doing their jobs correctly, etc. That would have been IMPOSSIBLE for me.
I know that my mother is receiving good care while I have been unable to take care of her needs.
"she's much happier now that she gets out of her apartment to sit with other women for breakfast, lunch and dinner..."
She wants company.
I'd rather hang out with gal pals than a middle aged son.. just saying
The 24/7 for aides for people this advanced would be three times this. And would probably not help with socialization. To the end, bestie's mom had this ephemeral peer group, every day was Groundhog Day for them, and they had socialization within this.