Does anyone have any ideas of how to get my mom who is dementia with mobility issues to stop cancelling her aide that come in once a week then she calls me and asks why didn't my aide come today, GRRRrrrrrrr so darn frustrating I explain it goes in one ear and out into empty air. I do have Health and Financial power.
Mt situ was different as I didn't have POA (long story) so didn't have power to make her keep the care. She is functioning independently for now but knows when she needs care in the future she is going to care facility because she can't be trusted to comply with in home assistance. She blew her chance.
It's frustrating and annoying to have to play the game and repeat same scenario over and over. Threaten her with a move if she doesn't let aid as scheduled and see if that helps. Hard when they have dementia and don't remember. Hopefully same aide comes so they can build trusting relationship over time.
Knowing what my friend went through with her mom and how much my mom is like hers--feuds among the children about what could/should be done, seeing her mom being kicked out of a hospice facility because she was hallucinating,, getting her mom into an assisted living place and then the assisted living facility tell her (my friend) that her mom couldn't stay because she needed a higher level of care....getting a call that her mom is walking down a street in the middle of the night....and then having her mom pass away within a few months of being taken from her home...
Home health care aides are paid so poorly and have such a high turnover that I can see how an agency can't keep sending someone who won't be let in (I'm pretty sure they don't get paid if they don't perform the service.) Makes me get a knot in my stomach just thinking about it.
Sorry, skyisblue, that this isn't really helpful advice. You are not alone in this situation. Looking forward to others giving feedback and thoughts.
More scary for me is that my mom sounds like she will be doing the same thing once we get her services set up. We've tried the posted notes and the calendar, but she keeps taking the notes down and doesn't remember what day or month it is or remember to look at the calendar or remember why someone is coming over even when it is written down. I
Making sure the aide is used to dealing with dementia patients is an excellent idea. Having the aide call you will work if you can take phone calls at that time. My friend could not as personal calls were not allowed where she works except for on breaks. Good luck!