and I know at some point we may have to...but right now she can care for herself, she can feed herself, make herself a sandwich, bath and comb her hair. So how do I know if I am doing the right thing by her? I don't want her to feel like a prisoner here. It's EASY to say "put me in a nursing home!" when you are young and healthy...it's different when you are old and helpless..she may have meant it then, but am I bound by that? does she still feel that way? IT is so hard to communicate with her through the dementia.