My dear sweet Mother has turned into a difficult mean person !
They are moving her to a private room, she choked her room mate and is threatening others.
This just breaks my heart, she's 5ft2in and weighs 110 and has never been anything but sweet.
I don't know how to deal with this, I feel like getting in my car and just keep driving to no where.I'm too old for this, I'm scared-lonely and just lost.
Does she have dememtia--
Sue
I believe she is threatening, just from some of her remarks
She is content while I'm with her, but never happy anymore and as far as I can tell, she will never be happy again and I reallly see no reason that she could or would be.
Going to see her leaves me drained, I just really want to run away but I'm too old for that.
I just thank God that she isn't nasty with me.
Everything Lilliput said is straight up. Especially the Scarlett O'Hara part!
It's a sad part of this terrible disease that this happens. I know my Mom mellowed out considerably when we started her on Namenda.
Good luck and know that you're being thought of by those of us who fight this fight and somehow continue on. Reaching out for help here is genius because all of these folks are neck deep in it too and we won't let you go too nuts!!
be safe,
Bobbie
I keep going though because every now and then she tells me how much she appreciates me being there and that makes it all worth it.
My heart and prayers go out to you. I know how frustrating it can get when there doesn't seem to be a good answer anywhere you look. I keep talking about "running away from home" too...we may pass each other on the road!
I had a moment like this right before the holidays. So I emailed a good friend who had just taken care of his grandmother until her passing. Instead of emailing me back he called and we talked and laughed for hours. After our conversation, I literally felt like a new person. We shared all the craziness that seems to come from otherwise good-natured seniors and how demanding they can be.
Is there someone you can talk to? (a good friend, counselor, clergy member, neighbor, or support group member) It is amazing how uplifting it can be if you can just articulate your feelings to someone with a patient ear. (and conversely, because you are fragile right now, avoid any negative family members, etc.)
I also turn to something creative. It takes my mind away from things even if it is for a moment or two.
It sounds like your mother's facility has done the appropriate thing by moving her. At least she is no longer a threat to others. When you are not assisting her, just try to think of anything but caregiving. I know it is hard, but there are just some days when I have to do a "Scarlet O'Hara" and "think about it tomorrow."
Take care,
Lilli