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Our septuagenarian mother (diagnosed with Alzheimer's last year) is currently eating one gallon of ice cream every 2 to 3 days. How have other families helped restrict / limit intake to reduce her risk of obesity, hyperlipidemia, hyperglycemia, dental caries, etc? It is her one joy in life so we also don't want to take that away from her.

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Alright I'll crash the gate here. What is the problem? Let her have five gallons a Day if she wants it! You're welcome
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drbjoefnp Aug 29, 2024
Sorry if I offended you with my question, we are truly worried about her health so dropping the F-bomb on a stressful situation is not needed.
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I suppose Gemswinner has a point. Decent icecream is fairly healthy, as long as the rest of the diet is OK with not too much sugar. Deep fried chips are much worse!

To regulate it, I would buy the icecream in smaller containers, keep the stock in a small hidden freezer, and bring out a new one a while after she has finished the last. 'Sorry, we've run out - can you make this last tonight?'
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drbjoefnp Aug 29, 2024
Thanks, like I said our concern was her health as she gained about 20 pounds in the past 2 months. I appreciate your help.
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I vote for a *Reasonable amount*.

Imagine what a nurse does in a hospital.. Or an kitchen assistant in an aged care home.

I think I would serve a second helping of icecream - if asked for it. But that's it. Just as I did for my kids & birthday cake.

Does the issue need to go deeper? I don't think so.

So many people with dementia/ Alzheimer’s or brain injures love love love icecream.
Factors can make people lose their own 'reasonable amount limit'.

Fauty short term memory is a big factor, unable to process appetite messages being sent to the brain, is another. Impulse control - another big factor.

I don't care about the arguement
of: someone is elderly let them eat whatever vs better nutrician argument.
Just go with common sense.
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Drj, I just wanted to apologize for the issues, that really never happens or who we are.

The office will handle it.

Id say actually my mom loves her ice cream and dairy, but in long term it caused me more work because her blood test kept coming back, high calcium, so then cut back more blood work.

So I'm sure cutting her back is a good idea. Sure let them eat what they enjoy to a point.

As for how honestly I have no answers, hopefully others have some good ideas later.

Again so sorry, don't leave us because of someone having a very bad night
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Reply to Anxietynacy
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I vote for letting your mother eat whatever she darn well wants. I mean hasn't she earned that right at her age? Let her have her "one joy in life."
I better not have either of my children tell me what I should or shouldn't be eating when I get older. Heck they better not try telling me now at my young age of 65.

One of the ladies in my caregiver support group whose mother lived to be 102, shares often how her mother who had Alzheimer's, lived on just ice-cream and cashews for the last 5 years of her life.
Now that is the kind of a diet that I want to be on the last 5 years of my life. I'm just saying.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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Why are you worried about  obesity, hyperlipidemia, hyperglycemia, or dental issues? She has a terminal disease and will linger for even more years if you start worrying about and address any of these potential health issues.

Let her eat what she wants. Why prolong her life?
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Anxietynacy Aug 29, 2024
I agree, I'm just thinking it's probably easier on the caregiver to keep the weight down a little. Easier to help them get around and less appointments.
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I understand the concern for sure. My mom tried for years to keep my dad (who had dementia) on a somewhat healthy diet. But he rejected more and more foods and would literally hide whatever she gave him in dresser drawers, under his bed, or throw it in the yard along with plate and utensils (!) rather than eat it. The only things he would eat in his last 4-5 months on earth were one bowl of vanilla ice cream and tiny amounts of orange juice per day. It was that or starvation and believe me, we tried everything. Yes, his bowels were in a terrible state. He lost weight consistently for the last 3-4 years of his life, including the last months.

good luck!!
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Reply to Suzy23
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I'm assuming your Mother is in her home or someone else's and not in a facility? Otherwise who is providing the ice cream to her?

I think she should still have her ice cream but whoever is the on-hands person providing her care can perhaps switch to ice cream bars or sandwiches so that she has a finite amount she can eat at a time (and hide the rest from her). Also consider frozen yogurt or non-dairy ones (there are some tasty ones out there). Would she eat a sundae? Like adding a fresh banana and nuts to one bowl a day?

More info would be helpful.
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Reply to Geaton777
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I would substitute the gallon of presumably regular ice cream for low sugar and low fat half gallons or quarts, and include fruit in a sundae style, or incorporate fruit and protein powder into a smoothie or shake. Breyers makes a low carb low-fat option starting at 60 calories a scoop, compared to 340 calories for Ben and Jerry’s. The latter may make you fat; the former has fewer calories than an apple.
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LoopyLoo Aug 29, 2024
…. But be careful with low sugar or substitute sugar ice cream. Some of these artificial sweeteners will cause diarrhea. Like Niagara Falls. Don’t ask how I know.
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Ice cream maker for someone to make her own for her.
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MargaretMcKen Aug 29, 2024
How helpful to advise for another caregiver job!?
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Not sure where she is with her diagnosis but she could be around for many, many years. The 20lb weight gain would concern me too with all the added medical problems (and the associated discomfort that comes along with it) that you may have to juggle along with the Alzheimer's.

Is she going out still and buying it for herself? Not much you can do except try to counsel her about it.

If someone is enabling her, stop it. There's a few good suggestions here about limiting her without taking it away. She SHOULD be able to enjoy it if she wants. I love ice cream. If I was dying and someone took it away I'd probably throw my diaper against the wall until I got it back.

If she's declining quickly and you believe she's going to pass away relatively soon I'd just let her have it. Hospice will enter the scene eventually and none of the other issues will matter anyway.
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Reply to Sha1911
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Idea: In an individual freezer bowl(s), or popsicle containers..I put fruit (your choice) in first and mix with Oikos vanilla 17g protein no sugar yogurt.
This yogurt tastes like cake frosting. So yummy!
You need to let it sit out about 15 minutes for the yogurt to soften before eating.
My husband is diabetic. He loves it.
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This is just me, but I feel that once someone hits age 75, they can pretty much eat, drink, or smoke as much as they want.
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Hothouseflower Aug 29, 2024
Yes that’s when I’m breaking loose 😁
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drbjoefnp, welcome to the forum. As we get older we tend to lose our sense of taste. I noticed that with my own Mom, who was in her 90's, per her grocery list.


My Mom had ice cream, Little Debbies, Hostess, a pie, chocolate chip muffins, anyway you get the picture. Yes, she had other food items on the list but it seemed she lived on sweets because she could still taste the sweetness. She lived to be 98. And, of course, my Dad was more than happy with the deserts :)
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what were her wishes when younger? Did she say she she wanted to be as healthy as possible? Live as long as possible?
knowing what she wanted for later life might help you with this decision
can you switch it to lower fat, sugar free ice cream as a compro mise?
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Reply to strugglinson
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Why worry about your mothers health? She's already terminally ill, unfortunately. With AD and dementia, they love sweets. And ice cream is THE #1 comfort food on earth. Every time there's a crisis in our family, my daughter and I go out and buy ice cream to consume in mass quantities. True story.

In any event, buy pint size tubs of ice cream once a week and call it a day. If she cries for more, either deal with it or buy more.

Fwiw, I used to pray daily for God to take my mother who suffered from dementia. I'd bring her bags of chocolate and cookies at her Memory Care ALF because she loved sweets and had spent her whole life dieting. She ordered ice cream 2x a day, for lunch and dinner dessert. In her old age, she gained about 50 lbs. at least. So I bought her pretty clothes in bigger sizes.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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What stage is she in? If early stages she may be around still for a while and practically speaking will be much harder to get around or to be handled/assisted physically at a larger weight. Also may contribute to more health problems and doctor appointments for you both to contend with.
My mother and my father-in-law both preferred sweets as they got older. The big issue with my Mom was constipation and trying to get fiber and water down her. She forgot how little she drank.
Let her have the ice cream but maybe try making some shakes with milk or soy or nut or coconut milk added to the ice cream? Also, make some ice cream pops with some chopped frozen fruit added? Could be made with a lowfat yogurt as well. I fool myself with "banana nice cream" and "cherry nice cream"- puree chopped frozen fruit, and add avocados or nut butters for fat, some plain greek yogurt etc... Possibilities are endless, tasty and healthier. Best eaten right after made or frozen in smaller batches to set out and soften before eating. Make a batch and swap out between regular ice cream. Does she like sherbets, sorbets or gelato? Also often lower in calories. How about snow cones with flavored syrup?
They have just publicized that the artificial sweetener erythritol is causing blood clots so I personally would stay away from consumption of the sugar alcohols. Bless you both on this hard journey.
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Basically, when we get into the youngsters trying to control our diet I rebel.
I am 82. If I want to eat an entire bag of Trader Joe's Original Potato Chips OR an ENTIRE box of ice cream sandwiches, that is up to ME.
PUH-LEEZE.
Am I not of an age? To decide WHAT I EAT and when? To decide how much?

Are you now the parent who will dole out the sweets?
Please kill me first.

I have to say, having thought long and hard on this one, having seem the "youngsters" now in their 60s trying to control our diets so we can live another 1/23 decade in misery? Why? What for?

l just ask you.
THINK ABOUT IT.
Please. I beg you. Please.
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Beatty Aug 30, 2024
Agree - but you are independant still Alva! So your biz! No-one elses.

My LO shops, buys, serves own icecream in own home. So her biz too. At home.

However, when out at a regular function where moring tea was served to many, this became a situation that needed 'food policing'. My LO would sit next to the shared biscuit plate & keep eating with no impuse control. There was a young man with TBI that would do same. Staff would never be harsh but would manage this discretely by serving individual portions to these people, then moving the plate out of reach & view of them. Requests for more would need delay & distract tactics.
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When I was a teenager I was 5'7" and 130 pounds at my heaviest. I had a healthy diet and exercised a lot with school sports. My Mom called me "fat butt" and allowed my brother to call me "chubs". She's 88 and has gained a lot of weight because all she wants is dessert. I won't play Food Cop with her because as long as she can enjoy something and make some decisions about what to eat or not I figure that's up to her. I secretly derive pleasure now that SHE'S the "fat butt". I'm 63 and I'm heavier now but I'm working on it. If my kids were to play Food Cop or interfere with what I want to eat it would damage our relationship.

I'm assuming you have a good relationship with your Mom and want her to stay alive as long as possible. That's commendable, but focus on other things. Average age of death is 79 in the U.S. - if she's in her 70s now, whatever you do will not extend her lifespan much.
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Reply to IneedPeace
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I have to agree with everyone here, let her eat what she wants. If you are worried about nutrition you can always make her a milkshake with her favorite ice cream and put some protein powder in it.
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Reply to Jhalldenton
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Get individual serving cups of ice cream. Limit her intake to after lunch and after dinner. May have to lock freezer to insure she doesn't sneak extra. You then are indulging her preference while protecting her health.
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You Can get ice cream Made with rice Milk Or coconut Milk at Trader Joes or these ice cream sandwiches called Mochi At TJ's - they are Healthy . My Mother towards the end would only eat Yoghurt .
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Igloocar Sep 2, 2024
These options are also usually quite high in calories. Also, as far as I can understand, coconut milk is now not considered to be a healthy option; I don't know about rice milk. Frozen yogurt might be a little better than ice cream if she is OK with eating it.
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I looked at a conversion site to see how much a US gallon is in litres - nearly 4 litres. That's almost 8 tubs of Ben & Jerry's ice cream.

I believe that anyone has the right to eat whatever they want, and I think that a person with a life-limiting disease shouldn't be dissuaded from eating even the most unhealthiest of foods.
However, such a high quantity of calorie dense food will cause major problems for both the person with Alzheimer's and whoever is caring for them due to weight related mobility issues.

If possible, try and swap the real stuff for the low sugar, low fat versions of ice-cream. Don't worry about any long-term effects of additives; there really isn't any point at this stage. However, do check for potential short-term ill-effects such as diarrhoea, which was mentioned in another reply.

If your mother will not be satisfied with the fake ice-cream, then you will have to limit your mother's access to ice-cream. This can only be done if you have POA, or if you have control another way.

I wouldn't stop serving ice-cream, but only do so at certain times and be stricter with portion control.
If your mum likes bananas, cooked apples, or tinned pairs, or any other soft fruit, I would serve this with the ice-cream to make it a big treat, but healthier.

If you do not have control over your Mum's food choices, then you need to try and get this as soon as you can.
Wishing you all the best.
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Anxietynacy Sep 2, 2024
Oh yeah, it's a lot of ice cream!
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My GFs mother has ALZ and she eats very little. But enjoys glass or three of wine and she never drunk before.
So will she become alcoholic or she dies because of it? Maybe, she is close to 90, but healthy otherwise may live another 10 years. Does it matter if alcohol is probably not good for her as she eats so little? Probably, but she enjoys it now!
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Anxietynacy Sep 2, 2024
Id say let her have the wine and enjoy. Just make sure if she gets sick and can't drink to tell the doctors, DTs, can be really bad for the aging
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I think I would find options with less sugar content and less fat content, like a mildly sweet ice milk. As MargaretMcKen suggested, limit the quantity available to her. Allow her to indulge in this sweet treat, but when it's gone, she's done.

Can you determine if she is craving sweet, craving the milkfat, or craving ice?
Perhaps there is something else which will satisfy this craving. If she is not eating well during the day, maybe she really is hungry and filling her body's need for calories, and this has become her go-to habit.

Sorry, I don't have any suggestions for substitutes. But you seem to be a smart person and probably have connections, for instance consult with a dietician for ideas. From your name, it looks like you're a doctor? or a nurse?

I think her long-term prognosis is an important factor here. If she has Alzheimer's and her health is declining, how important is it to control her diet and her weight, or is she already in danger of serious complications from this indulgence? You'll have to weigh the benefits and risks to find a reasonable solution for her needs, while letting her have "her one joy in life".
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Reply to CaringWifeAZ
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I would let her eat what she wants!
My dad w/PDD ate ALOT of ice cream over a period of 4 years after my mom died. He would go through 2 or 3 half gallons every week. Then he stopped…..I am not sure if it was due to the dementia progression, moving him from his home to ours, being fed more nutritious food consistently or he just lost the taste for it. It is hard to understand, but seems par for the course in this dementia journey!! Hope you find answers that help!! Have a blessed day!
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Reply to Bobbie61
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I buy the chocolate covered ice cream on a stick from Walmart. They are only 110 calories each, and I keep a small supply in the upstairs freezer for my AD patient to help himself to and enjoy. The rest are stored in a basement freezer. He has to get up from his recliner to get himself one, and he does not ever go down the stairs to the basement when the supply is gone. I found when I kept half gallons of ice cream in the freezer he would fill the bowl to the brim. The smaller serving size of the ice cream on a stick definitely limits the amount he consumes.
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Reply to OldCaregiver121
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Let her eat what she wants.
If you are really concerned you could switch to a "lower fat, lower sugar" ice cream but I think the fake stuff is worse than the sugar and fats in the real stuff.
You could try freezing containers of yogurt. and give her containers of frozen yogurt.
There is also a product called "YoNannas" and you freeze bananas and put them through this thing and you get a "soft serve consistency" ice cream like product.
the Ninja Ice cream maker product allows you to make smaller portions of "ice cream" and you can make it how you want.
But all that said let her eat what she wants. I think at this point with a diagnosis of Alzheimer's the high LDL and other things you are worried about really are not going to shorten her life and by restricting you are are not going to extend her life.
If she does gain weight and it makes it more difficult for you to safely care for her there is equipment that can make it easier and safer for you and mom.
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Reply to Grandma1954
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Allow her to eat what she wants. It brings her comfort. My mom is obsessed with potato chips. They are only here for a short time. Let your mom enjoy!
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Reply to Onlychild2024
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Plain and simple. Don't allow her to eat a half-gallon of ice cream a day. You can give her ice cream several times a day, just not huge servings that equal a half-gallon a day or near to. She has to eat regular and healthy food as well. Much like with a child you can't let her eat a half gallon of ice cream. The same as you don't let the child eat a bag of candy for dinner.

Start getting her the single-serving individual ice cream cups. They're small servings so if she had five or six a day it wouldn't equal anywhere near the amount she's eating now. Get lower sugar and low-fat varieties along with different kinds of ice cream. Try giving her a couple of Weight Watcher's brand chocolate fudge pops instead. They're low-cal and low sugar. They're also really good.

Don't take her ice cream away from her. Just add some moderation and common sense to the servings.
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