He has been paying her bills for 5 years from dad and mom's account when dad died. There was appx $60,0000 according to dad in the account, but he never let anyone verify that amount. Now he claims all the money is gone, but will not let anyone audit her account. In addition, he is keeping all her SS money and annunity since Aug 2017 and hasn't paid a dime to the nursing home, but has kept this money. The GA APS has completed a report about his abuse and closed the case since my brother and I have been paying the nursing home. We can't do anything since we don't have POA, and are considering stop paying cause we can't pay for much longer. Will Medicare take over her nursing home? She does have advance stage dementia.
Can you even rent a apt for $550/month? Assisted living won't be cheaper than that.
As for your Dad saying how much was in the account, unless one had a bank Statement showing said amount, one would need to take the number with a grain of salt. I remember one time my Dad said he had $8M in stocks. Guess he was showing his inner Warren Buffet, and nope, Dad didn't have that much in stocks. It's interesting how an elder's brain can play tricks.
By the way, what was on the APS report? Was your brother arrested for felony theft? If not, apparently no theft was found. Did your brother tell you he was keeping Mom's social security and annuity? Are you sure that the nursing home isn't pull the amount that they need directly from Mom's bank account. Thus you are paying the remainder of the cost?
Nursing homes can be expensive. My Dad was paying $12k per month for my Mom's care.
Sign your Mom up for Medicaid [Medicare is totally different], who in turn will pay for room, board, and care. I am really surprised that a Social Worker at the nursing home didn't talk to you about Medicaid, so you wouldn't need to pay out of your own pocket.
Let us know what happens.
Have you applied for Medicaid for her?