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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I have several painful conditions. He doesn't sleep well so I don't either. Trying to get house work done and yard kept up, I feel like I'm doing my best and he sees me as the enemy. Keep me in your prayers.
I'm so sorry to hear about that. Just don't lose hope. In times of very difficult situations, you just have to manage your time well. Yes alternate the chores so that you'll have more time taking care of your husband. Most importantly, have some time for yourself, take a break from all the stress.God bless! We'll definitely pray for you.
I'm so sorry you are "the enemy". I was the enemy too with my mom, who told everyone she hated her daughter (me). 🙁
Dont take it personally. They truely are out of their minds and would never speak this way if they didn't have the illness. It's best to counter with, "I love you even if you don't love me." then walk away.
You MUST take some of the burden off yourself and let others (family, friends, neighbors, church members, etc.) take a few hours a week so you can get out or get some much needed sleep. If you don't, then burnout (physically and mentally "crashing and burning") comes next. That could land you in the hospital. Hubby would be put in a facility while you recouperate.
Let the majority of the housework go. Meals and dishes are enough. Who's going to come to see (or care) if you vacuumed or dusted?
Make a list of priorities, with the most important first. After #4, forget about them. It's self preservation.
I sure will include you in our prayers, along with all the other caregivers on this board. What a difficult life this can be! 😔
Texas gem, I am sending you big hugs. I care for my bedridden husband. A few primary care physicians and at least 7 neurologists plus several outpatient therapy sessions, scores of tests and one extended stay of 4 months in rehab haven’t shown anything wrong with him. So basically I do everything but feed him for no reason. Other events in our lives have left me depressed and fearful for the future.
I have totally accepted the fact that I cant do it. The house is neglected and so is the yard. He blames me for our extreme financial difficulties. We’ve been fighting more recently than we ever have.
Please, please do as I say and not as I do. Watch out for yourself. Get a health aide for some respite care. We are applying for a Medicaid Waiver Program that should cover at least part of this help. I’m hopeful they will be able to help us out.
Do what you can. Sparkles gives wonderful advice. I love the “one shower wall” one!
Dear texasgem- Hang in there. I can tell you care about yours and husband's living conditions. You are doing your best. Just one point... Yes, caring for your home (and everything!) is important. But, YOU personally are your most valuable asset! And if you die... Who cares for everyone? So you have to care for you.
I understand, dealing with your own or others chronic health stuff is downright relentless. Personally... I had to lower my expectations. I can no longer have a house that is completely clean, at least all at the same time! I find breaking things into smaller bits makes me feel like I am making headway. Instead of cleaning the entire bathroom... I break it in half. Clean the sink and toilet one day, and then the floors another day. I also clean one wall of the shower every time I am in it. So I can ignore the shower completely during cleaning time! The rest... Well, it will wait patiently for you. No cleaning fairies ever arrive in the middle of the night! Darn! And conversely, no cleaning police come either. Just know that you aren't alone, even though it feels like it sometimes. I hope this helps. Big Hugs. Sparkles.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Dont take it personally. They truely are out of their minds and would never speak this way if they didn't have the illness. It's best to counter with, "I love you even if you don't love me." then walk away.
You MUST take some of the burden off yourself and let others (family, friends, neighbors, church members, etc.) take a few hours a week so you can get out or get some much needed sleep. If you don't, then burnout (physically and mentally "crashing and burning") comes next. That could land you in the hospital. Hubby would be put in a facility while you recouperate.
Let the majority of the housework go. Meals and dishes are enough. Who's going to come to see (or care) if you vacuumed or dusted?
Make a list of priorities, with the most important first. After #4, forget about them. It's self preservation.
I sure will include you in our prayers, along with all the other caregivers on this board. What a difficult life this can be! 😔
I have totally accepted the fact that I cant do it. The house is neglected and so is the yard. He blames me for our extreme financial difficulties. We’ve been fighting more recently than we ever have.
Please, please do as I say and not as I do. Watch out for yourself. Get a health aide for some respite care. We are applying for a Medicaid Waiver Program that should cover at least part of this help. I’m hopeful they will be able to help us out.
Do what you can. Sparkles gives wonderful advice. I love the “one shower wall” one!
Hang in there.
I can tell you care about yours and husband's living conditions. You are doing your best.
Just one point... Yes, caring for your home (and everything!) is important. But, YOU personally are your most valuable asset! And if you die... Who cares for everyone? So you have to care for you.
I understand, dealing with your own or others chronic health stuff is downright relentless.
Personally... I had to lower my expectations. I can no longer have a house that is completely clean, at least all at the same time! I find breaking things into smaller bits makes me feel like I am making headway. Instead of cleaning the entire bathroom... I break it in half. Clean the sink and toilet one day, and then the floors another day. I also clean one wall of the shower every time I am in it. So I can ignore the shower completely during cleaning time! The rest... Well, it will wait patiently for you. No cleaning fairies ever arrive in the middle of the night! Darn! And conversely, no cleaning police come either.
Just know that you aren't alone, even though it feels like it sometimes. I hope this helps.
Big Hugs.
Sparkles.