We are worried as nurses say they are not appropriatly staffed to constantly monitor him. When he was at home, he would always try to ‘escape’ his apt building. Now when in a wheelchair, he still tries to get out. He also yells at me to leave when I visit. It’s a nice facility, one of few that would accept him with his early stage dementia. We need him to stay. We are scheduled to have a meeting with the facility Dr., social worker and nurses Tuesday morning. Any advice to prepare for this meeting is appreciated.
Therefore it is important that the facility understand that hubby cannot return home.
What MAY more likely happen if this extreme agitation continues is a transfer to acute care either hospital or psychiatric facility where they can attempt to find a drug or drug cocktail that can provide hubby some relief without knocking him out. This takes some trial and error often enough.
You message to us is a bit confused and confusing and I think this awful circumstance has thrown you into a whirlwind of anxiety and fear. So I am going to advise you:
1. DEEP BREATHES. 10 of them in and out slowly. OFTEN.
2. Ask to speak to Social Worker or charge nurse of doctor who is appropriate to speak with at this particular facility.
Tell this person that:
A) Any thought of hubby coming back home is out of the question. You can no longer care for him.
B) Ask for what plan if any is afoot involving his care.
C) Tell them you are very anxious about all this, and must remain fully informed; as that you be contacted for any plans, any changes.
I am so sorry for these heartbreaking circumstances and I wish you the best of luck, hoping you will update us.
The medication can be tricky if he has LBD and not a Vascular dementia or Alzheimer's.
If he is trying to get out of the wheelchair request the doctor order a "Tilt back" wheelchair. The back can be tilted so that it makes it much more difficult to get out of and it also makes it more difficult to fall out of.
And since you seem to be a trigger for him right now, I would perhaps keep your visits to a bare minimum for a while, until the facility can get his medications adjusted accordingly.
Dementia sucks!!!
How long has he been in this facility? Is he in MC?
Is he currently on medications for his agitation/anxiety? If not, it is urgent to have his doctor get this to happen.
Has he been checked for a UTI?
How old is he?
What state are you in?
If he is a fall risk, his bed needs to be lowered all the way down, or he can get a concave mattress, or put his current mattress directly onto the floor.
For his wheelchair, I think what restraints they are legally able and willing to use will be discussed at the meeting. I think it varies by state.