My mom who is 83 might be coming to live with me. Since being in a rehab facility, she’s been wetting the bed almost every night. Advice?

Lysol laundry sanitizer,
"kills 99.9% of bacteria" 0% bleach

So, plenty of suggestions here - disp briefs, waterproof mattress + bed pads, etc., plus laundry options (do heed my warnings about vinegar and bleach - big NONO!) Your profile indicates this plan to take mom in is temporary, but you also mention that her "mental and cognitive have declined.", so this plan may have to change. It all depends on finding out what is behind the night time bed wetting. Taking care of the issue and laundry is secondary - this should be the more important aspect.

While this is of concern (no idea why she's in hospital rehab, was it injury or stroke?) and should be checked, note there are other, often treatable, medical issues that can contribute to both the cognitive decline and bed wetting. If she had a stroke, it may be why her cognitive abilities have declined. If she had any anesthesia, it can also contribute to cognitive issues. Sometimes these can resolve over time (being in unfamiliar places, esp moving to hospital then rehab can also contribute to some confusion), but she should have a full checkup when she is ready to come "home" or as soon as possible after discharge, whether it is to your place or hers. She may not be able to pass the mini-mental exam, BUT it would be a baseline, so if her condition improves, it would be observable.

I did see someone finally mentioned the UTI. Your profile indicates she has had some issue with UTIs. When I first joined this forum, I was skeptical of the UTI comments, until it happened to my mother! She used to have UTIs several times/year when she was still competent, and would manage to get it checked/treated on her own. Many months after we moved her to MC, she got her first UTI there and had severe sun-downing (agitated, demanded she had to get out, go home, had guests, etc) This went on every day later in the day until the UTI was found and treated (it started on a Fri night, so no access to doc! Also, she would be "fine" in the morning!) We also had to add anti-anxiety until it was resolved.

So, your mother isn't having sun-downing, BUT, I wanted to mention the above because it IS a sign of UTI. Too often in elders there are no "typical" signs of UTI. That said, the next 2 UTIs mom had resulted in night time bed wetting - SOAKING everything! No sun-downing, just soaking the bed, herself, etc, even with disp briefs. Once it was found she had a UTI and it was treated, the bed wetting stopped. The nurse in charge realized this when the second episode of bed wetting happened, so it was found and treated sooner!

So, one component of that health check before she comes home or as soon as possible after is get her checked for UTI - the dip stick test may not be enough, you should request a urine culture, esp since she has a history of UTIs. It might be wise to see if this can be done NOW, before the planned discharge.

Meanwhile, you could start learning about dementia, researching what's available for services (hired aides for her home or yours) and facilities, because if this is dementia, eventually you ARE going to need help and/or find a place for mom. Being a working single mom is hard enough (been there, done that!), but if mom's care is going to be more than just providing a safe place temporarily, you are most likely to get in over your head!

I put the urine clothing and bedding in washer and run a "rinse only" cycle with at least 1 cup of vinegar. You can also buy "Odo-Ban" but a gallon is about 10X the price of a gallon of vinegar. After that rinse cycle is done, I do a regular wash in warm water with detergent. I also buy the re-usable/washable Chux which are pads for bed that go underneath the person's mid-section for their bed or chair. They absorb the urine. I put the Chux on top of the sheet. I also put a disposable bed pad under the Chux because the Chux is not completely waterproof. For the bed buy Chux in large size in case it shifts during the night. They come in various sizes. I bought from Ebay. I got 4 for about $30. Let me know if you need more info.

i used Arm&Hammer oxy fresh detergent. If you have BJ’s Club-they have a better adult disposable diaper which was much better than Depends and 10$ less per case of 92. I also had a waterproof mattress cover under the fitted sheet and put a disposable waterproof pad (paper on top/plastic backing) on top of the fitted sheet. From Walgreens. I also cut them in half to line his wheelchair later on. This worked very well sometimes put a towel on top of the pad to make it softer and stay in place. My dad could get to the bathroom and change these himself ( or change the underwear in bed himself. Self closing metal cans with disposable garbage bags were a great fit and controlled the odor. Yes UTI definitely made this worse

I use washable chucks on Amazon. They never leaked. I put mom in underwear with a pad during the day. No issues with bed sores. At night Sams club pull ups with a Sams club pad inside. Rarely leaks. Then I wash the clothes and bed pads with Arm & Hammer Oxyclean. I pre spray the washable pads with Oxyclean.
Medline Softnit 300 Washable Underpads, Pack of 4 Large Bed Pads, 34" x 36",
You may find once she is out of rehab she is not incontinent. It was just no one coming to assist her. 5 years ago when mom broke her femur rehab said she was incontinent. Once home she was fine.

There's a product called Odoban or Odorban. Works pretty good to cut smells in fabrics. I get it at Sam's. There's also Gain original that works wonders. Any of the laundry detergents that have Fabreze are good. Put them in washer and let agitation start and then turn washer off to soak a while, then start again.
Some folks use vinegar in the washer to cut odor.
If she was not wetting bed prior to rehab, the problem is probably due to short staff not answering call buttons quick enough and the patients have no other choice. They just can't hold it long enough to wait on assistance. Problem may resolve in the home if you put a potty chair next to bed and get her up several time during the night to retrain the bladder to pee in pot and not in the pants. You might also add a pad or pull up in the beginning that can be tossed out.

Don't like to repeat myself, but I do know that often people post comments without reading all the previous responses.

Vinegar can be used to cut urine odor, but if you do this, do NOT add bleach to the laundry. They form a chemical reaction and the result is Chlorine Gas.

Repeat: DO NOT USE BOTH VINEGAR AND CHLORINE TOGETHER!

For some detail and other interesting do not mix items:

https://www.buzzfeed.com/peggy/16-common-product-combinations-you-should-never-mix

There are a few stores that cater to elder supply items.

Johnhusic,

UTI is urinary tract infection
MC is memory care facility