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Mom thinks she will be going home to her house next month. Sister denies that mom's house is for sale but my brother found out the sale is pending. What can we do to stop this?
Susan, just curious how did your brother find out that Mom's house was For Sale? Is there a real estate sign in the yard? if not, then how was this information gathered?
My Dad had dementia but in the mornings he was pretty alert. Dad had me sell his house. Dad understood the Real Estate Listing Agreement, initial it and signed where needed. He was so glad to let that house go as he knew he wouldn't want to go back. Just too much work for him being in his 90's.
Once my Dad's house sold, the equity went into his bank account to be used for his care. He was happy knowing he could pay for Independent Living and later Assisted Living with the funds. It gave him peace of mind.
Oh, if your Mom's house is really for sale and has a ratified Contract, if you stop the sale of the house, the Buyer could sue the family for breach of contract.
Who has financial POA? Is there a legal guardian? Is mother still competent to make her own decisions? Would her doctors agree?
What is Mom's financial situation? How is her health? Is she likely to need a care center? Is she paying for her room and board at your sister's? Who is paying to maintain her previous home? Taxes, upkeep, insurance, etc.
Why does sister want to sell the house? (Or does she just deny that she does?) Why do you not want the house sold? What does sister plan to do with the proceeds of the sale?
How long has mother been living with Sister? Do you and Brother help care for her? What has been your relationship with Sister?
Since Mother has dementia, it is perfectly possible that she and Sister have discussed this sale many times and Mom agreed that it is the right thing to do. Perhaps she signed the listing papers. And, with dementia, she could still think she is going home in a month. Obviously I don't know how likely that is; I just know it is entirely possible.
If there is a professional real estate agent involved, it would be very surprising if the ownership i's aren't dotted and the t's crossed. They only get paid if a sale goes through and most would see that there are no obstacles upfront. Similarly if a lawyer is involved I'd expect the transaction to be legitimate. But we don't know who has been involved, do we?
I'm sorry for so many questions, but often when we have more background information members are able to offer more meaningful suggestions to suit the particular situation.
As reallyreal says, if this sale violates Mother's rights, you can probably get the sale stopped. Act quickly. But there is also a chance that the sale is perfectly legitimate, in which case you won't have much to say about it.
Can you discuss this with your sister, calmly and reasonably? Or is your relationship beyond that point? I'd try finding out what is really going on from Sister if possible, before contacting the agent. But then I would talk to the agent.
Who has POA? You need to call real estate agent and Title insurance company and tell them that sister can not sell house, if it is true. I personally would contact the law and an attorney. If your mom thinks she's going home she obviously doesn't know and unless she has been deemed incompetent by a judge, her rights are being violated. Get law enforcement involved asap, pending means earnest money paid and other expenses to the buyer, they could sue over this. Good luck and let us know what happens, we all are learning and appreciate when anyone let's us know how it's going.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My Dad had dementia but in the mornings he was pretty alert. Dad had me sell his house. Dad understood the Real Estate Listing Agreement, initial it and signed where needed. He was so glad to let that house go as he knew he wouldn't want to go back. Just too much work for him being in his 90's.
Once my Dad's house sold, the equity went into his bank account to be used for his care. He was happy knowing he could pay for Independent Living and later Assisted Living with the funds. It gave him peace of mind.
Oh, if your Mom's house is really for sale and has a ratified Contract, if you stop the sale of the house, the Buyer could sue the family for breach of contract.
What is Mom's financial situation? How is her health? Is she likely to need a care center? Is she paying for her room and board at your sister's? Who is paying to maintain her previous home? Taxes, upkeep, insurance, etc.
Why does sister want to sell the house? (Or does she just deny that she does?) Why do you not want the house sold? What does sister plan to do with the proceeds of the sale?
How long has mother been living with Sister? Do you and Brother help care for her? What has been your relationship with Sister?
Since Mother has dementia, it is perfectly possible that she and Sister have discussed this sale many times and Mom agreed that it is the right thing to do. Perhaps she signed the listing papers. And, with dementia, she could still think she is going home in a month. Obviously I don't know how likely that is; I just know it is entirely possible.
If there is a professional real estate agent involved, it would be very surprising if the ownership i's aren't dotted and the t's crossed. They only get paid if a sale goes through and most would see that there are no obstacles upfront. Similarly if a lawyer is involved I'd expect the transaction to be legitimate. But we don't know who has been involved, do we?
I'm sorry for so many questions, but often when we have more background information members are able to offer more meaningful suggestions to suit the particular situation.
As reallyreal says, if this sale violates Mother's rights, you can probably get the sale stopped. Act quickly. But there is also a chance that the sale is perfectly legitimate, in which case you won't have much to say about it.
Can you discuss this with your sister, calmly and reasonably? Or is your relationship beyond that point? I'd try finding out what is really going on from Sister if possible, before contacting the agent. But then I would talk to the agent.