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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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She repeats the same questions over and over. Do we tell her he is in heaven or that we do not know where he is? We are at odds on the best replies and we wonder if she is doing this for attention. This is a new chapter for us.
My mother thinks she's married to her high school boyfriend that she hasn't seen since 1944 and who has been dead since 2009. She's always wondering where he is, so we've made him into a 94-year-old workaholic who leaves in the morning before she wakes up and returns at night after she goes to bed. All the staff at her memory care know about Dan the Man and what to tell Mom when he goes missing. Works like a charm.
My mother often asks me about her dead siblings & parents. I always tell her they're in Heaven together playing cards & drinking wine. And that she will definitely be reunited with them again when God calls her Home, but that time is not now. Otherwise, she insists on calling them on the phone CONSTANTLY and will not get off the subject. It creates more angst for me to lie to her than it does for me to tell her the truth. Because that's when there's closure for her and she's able to let GO of the matter, at least for a little while.
If your mother is like mine, making up constant stories about her husband's whereabouts will become a full time job when telling her the truth, while it may create a few tears for a couple of minutes, will likely give her more peace in the end. Dementia or no dementia, a person has the right to know the truth.
Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.
No, your mom is not doing this for attention. Sadly it often comes with the disease. You just tell her little "fiblets" like he had to run to the store, or he's out of town visiting his parents or whatever else you may come up with. Chances are she won't remember what you tell her anyway, so if the "fiblet" is different every time that is ok. Best wishes.
Neither. Tell her “he went for a haircut” “he went to get the paper” “he went to chase the crows out of the garden” —- ANYTHING that will be soothing and comforting to her.
If she has dementia, she is not able to understand doing ANYTHING to gain attention.
If she is under active treatment for the UTI, the questioning may (or may NOT) decline as she is treated, Otherwise this can last for a while and will then lessen until it declines as well.
The goal with repetitive questioning in someone with dementia is not usually based in fact. My LO presently randomly repeats “please help mePleasehelpmpleasehelpme with no need for help, but can be distracted into short conversations about her surroundings or things (like jewelry!) that she enjoys.
This is an example of something that can be much sadder and more difficult for a caregiver than a Loved One, but it does pass over time.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
https://thewomensalzheimersmovement.org/surviving-alzheimers-paula-spencer-scott/
My mother often asks me about her dead siblings & parents. I always tell her they're in Heaven together playing cards & drinking wine. And that she will definitely be reunited with them again when God calls her Home, but that time is not now. Otherwise, she insists on calling them on the phone CONSTANTLY and will not get off the subject. It creates more angst for me to lie to her than it does for me to tell her the truth. Because that's when there's closure for her and she's able to let GO of the matter, at least for a little while.
If your mother is like mine, making up constant stories about her husband's whereabouts will become a full time job when telling her the truth, while it may create a few tears for a couple of minutes, will likely give her more peace in the end. Dementia or no dementia, a person has the right to know the truth.
Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.
If she has dementia, she is not able to understand doing ANYTHING to gain attention.
If she is under active treatment for the UTI, the questioning may (or may NOT) decline as she is treated, Otherwise this can last for a while and will then lessen until it declines as well.
The goal with repetitive questioning in someone with dementia is not usually based in fact. My LO presently randomly repeats “please help mePleasehelpmpleasehelpme with no need for help, but can be distracted into short conversations about her surroundings or things (like jewelry!) that she enjoys.
This is an example of something that can be much sadder and more difficult for a caregiver than a Loved One, but it does pass over time.
Hope this is helpful.