My Dad gets a pension and social security totaling about $4000/month. We live in the Seattle area and the cheapest we have found for assisted living is $5000 month. I haven't looked into Medicaid but I'm assuming he makes too much. He currently lives in our home with my family (Married with two teenage boys). I use a caregiving service 3-4 days a week to give me a break but it's not enough. I'm so done and feel stuck. He has Parkinson's/dementia and can't be left alone.
It may be easier to get dad into a NH & onto NH medicaid from the start.
What can be done for those who have just too much income for Medicaid is that they get a Miller Trust done aka A Qualified Income Trust. Miller in how it gets setup (and not a DIY project imho) needs to be done by an experienced elder law attny. The key in Miller is that the income has to meet being "qualified" most do but some pension plans are more iffy in guarantee so don't. Basically with a Miller all the monthly income goes into the Miller trust and then the individual gets paid by the trust whatever your state has as the maximum income allowed with the excess either building in the trust over time or paid to the facility. All the income reverts to the state upon death too. Really good legal will know how to make Miller work.
Also you may need to go to his MD's to get his chart built up to show the need for skilled nursing care. When they are living at home or in IL, they often do not flat have the fat medical chart that one coming from a hospitalization does do the Medicaid required "at - need medically" documentation.
There's going to be a lot of paperwork in all this. I'd suggest you go and get 2 cute binders (all the back to school stuff is in stores) and get one going for medical and the other for financial and start pulling his info together (like a yr of banking and his awards letters from SS and retirements) and schedule a NAELA attorney appointment. First one you can do without dad to get a review done on where he stands in all then, then next one dad goes with you.
One of the experts on this site - Gabriel Heiser - has a great book on the overview on the mice maze that is Medicare, Medicaid and elderly issues that is great. You can order it or find it in your library. Get the book & good luck.
Washington Connection offers you a way to find and apply for a variety of services and assistance online. Click on “See if I qualify” to find out what services you may be eligible for through this site.
If you are:
Applying for children
A parent or caretaker applying with children
Pregnant or applying for someone who is pregnant
An adult 18 to 64 years old
You must apply for healthcare coverage at wahealthplanfinder org unless applying for help with Medicare expenses or with Long-Term Care services.
You can also contact your local Area Agency of Aging to see what's available in your area.
I don't believe you should be shouldering the cost of your dad's AL rent unless you are very wealthy. You have your own retirement to think of. As to Medicsid, fist make sure that this is a facility that will accept Medicaid. You should talk to an certified eldercare attorney about qualifying for Medicaid.
You should also ask the facility if they are willing to take your dad at the full amount of his pension. The ALs in my area are always having "specials" and the stated price is often negotiable. I would look at several ALs, not just the least expensive one you think he can afford.