My Mother's husband passed. Before he passed, HIS son of another marriage, had my mother and HIS father sign a POA. Financial & Medical and Executor; this was during his father's sickness, and my mother showing signs of possible onset dementia. I can not get any proof or straight answers whether she was diagnosed competent or not during the signing. I was unable to view properly the POA, nor was I able to view the Will (assist with mom) as I was concerned for my mother's well being future. He refuses to discuss her income, health or future with me. I have only met him once in mom's 17 years of marriage to his father. He moved in with his father too assist with him few months before passing. Against me, as he said he has the right to care giving....He continues to live there! Recently moved his family into my mom's house. My mother is miserable, depressed and HE claims she's broke. This is a mess. I'm going to the state where she lives to try and get her some resolution and take care of her myself but I know I'll need law with me. He is NOT looking out for her best interest.
Too much information, sorry.
Are you wanting now to take your mother into your OWN home? What are your plans if your Mother asks you to be her POA? If she has no dementia she can move where she likes and assign you POA if she wishes you to serve in that capacity. If she has dementia you may need to file for conservatorship or guardianship.
See an elder law attorney for advice if you need to.
The fact that the son in law has been caring for this elderly couple is going to give them some bona fides in this case.
So use the system. Try APS and see an elder law attorney.