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My father's caregiver lives outside the house with a boyfriend who does not follow social distancing and other CDC guidelines. I have been in touch with the boyfriend and he said he would follow them but he does not appear to be. The caregiver is great and I don't want to bring in yet another new person right now during this crisis, especially as my father has dementia and an unfamiliar face would not be good.


Not sure what to do as I am worried the caregiver's boyfriend's irresponsibility could bring in the virus.

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I totally understand your concerns. Your caregiver’s boyfriend should not be visiting your dad. You did not hire him. He has no business being part of the equation. Why expose your dad and risk his health? I wouldn’t want to do that either.

I would make it clear to the caregiver that her boyfriend should not be near your dad. Your dad is over 60 and at higher risk. I am over 60. I don’t want to be near people right now either.

Is the caregiver following all precautions?
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sunbrooke Apr 2020
Hi Need Help, the caregiver's boyfriend does not visit my dad, but I am concerned that because the caregiver lives with her boyfriend, that his behavior could infect her, and in turn, my father.
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You are correct to be concerned.
Your thoughts on the problems with bringing in another caregiver are valid as well. You have no idea if that person would be any better regarding association with the noncompliant. It’s a tough situation. I think I would work with your current caregiver.

You could ask the caregiver what she thinks you and she should do at dad’s house and what precautions she is taking in her own home.

What does she do now?
My aunts caretaker started in Feb keeping a log of her temp and my aunts each day. Some do this twice a day.

Since I’m staying with aunt now, I take our temps each morning along with her O2, pulse and BP, which we’ve done for years. Just added the temp since the virus.

You could also ask her to wear gloves and a mask and to keep 6 ft away when not having to do hands on care.
I don’t wear a mask in the home but neither do I go out. Following hospital staff procedures she could change clothes in the garage before coming in. Keep her hair covered and change that covering as well.
Wipe all surfaces frequently touched with disinfectant. Of course, most of this should be done anyway.
I try to use Clorox water on just about everything several times a week. Especially if my husband has had to go out for anything.
Of course you should be prepared to replace your caretaker should the boyfriend become ill or associate with anyone who does. If the caretaker shows signs that she believes in the precautions for your dad, perhaps she will also value her own health and encourage the boyfriend to practice physical distancing, hand washing etc.
i just read JoAnns answer. I didn’t take it that the BF was coming into your home! Absolutely no reason for him to be in your home or dad’s home. Zilch.
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sunbrooke Apr 2020
That is correct, the boyfriend does not enter my dad's home.
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All I can say is tell him again. He is NOT to enter your Dads home (or yours). If he doesn't abide by this, then u will call the police and file a report for trespassing. Make sure the Aide understands this. Telling her you appreciate all she does for Dad but precautions have to be taken. She needs to make sure her hands are washed all the time. Wear gloves, a mask whatever YOU want. Wipe down anything coming into the house.
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