Our 13 year old daughter just got invited to participate in the Midwest Closed Tennis Tournament, which is by invitation only for the best of the best players. I am so proud of her, she wants to be a pro player and this is where recruiters go. It lasts for 5 days and is a few hours away so we will be far from home. I don’t know what to do with Doc. There’s one worthless sibling who refuses to help at all, and we have no one to even come check on him. What exactly is respite care and how much planning or advance notice do you need? I think this will be a huge ordeal for Doc as he has never spent the night anywhere and would not understand why or agree that he cannot stay home alone. He gets confused on his whereabouts even at home, is a major sundowner, needs assistance and reminders to take meds, eat, shower, and for overall safety. What do you do with your loved one with dementia when you have to go out of town?
We put mthr in a memory care when she could no longer live by herself (we rescued her, actually). It has been really good for everyone. We have been able to send her postcards when we go to competitions and these get passed around to **all** of the residents at meal times. I don't think any of them know who those cards are from, but they all enjoy hearing about the sights, the news, and the reports on competitors.
We know my mthr is well kept and we don't have to worry. We are able to visit when we are home and it is a good situation. The kids are not exposed to the indignities of living with a grandparent in Depends and are able to enjoy what is presented publicly, with none of the embarrassing parts. My mthr is still at the same memory care 5 years later, while I've sent two kids off to college.
Since your daughter is at that age when she will be soaring and you want to be part of it, I'm of the opinion that it's time to find a memory care that is a trial period right now of respite, with the overall goal of grandpa staying there afterwards if his first week or two are good. He is only going to decline, and her teen years are done so fast. I've just realized my baby girl has a year before college- she's almost gone! The decline of old age is a slow goodbye, while the teen years are a quickly changing hello to adulthood.
** I’m being selfish this year ~ saved my money - paying for a seven day respite care stay in local nursing facility for my grandmom. Fortunately she was a volunteer in the past at the same facility so she’s looking forward to being there. I gave the facility six weeks notice (figure it’s the summer and folks want vacations - caregivers needing breaks). Already made a list of what I’m packing for her... including reminder notes - I have one framed that will be by her bedside, reminding her why she’s there, etc. The second one will stay with her chart in case the original note gets misplaced. **
Can’t really speak for average prices, but in my case... it’s $233 each day. True it’s expensive but it’s money well spent.