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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Be glad he believes in living a life! My 81 widowed mother lives like the living dead, a recluse watching TV all day and miserable. Funny thing is she was glad when my stepfather died, he was a monster. Be happy for him, he has not given up as a widower.
My mom died 10 years ago and my dad remarried an old family friend within 8 months. She died last October and nows he's living with us. Statistics show that men will remarry within a year of the death of a spouse. For me at 48, I can't see the big draw of kissing someone at that age... I'm leaning towards being a cat lady if I outlive my husband. I feel for you, for sure, but it's normal.
I think it is absolutely wonderful when older people find love! Though I do understand how grown children will become concerned because they are used to parents being together for so long.
My mom contacted her high school boyfriend, I tease her by telling her she tracked him down, shamelessly, about 10 years ago. My dad passed 45 years ago, mom had been without a husband for many years. Mom and boyfriend travelled across the country to see each other several times a year each. Finally, he decided to move here about 8 years ago. He was going to get an apartment, but was spending all his time at moms. They decided to live together, then married just about a year later on moms 80th birthday, seven years ago. They are extremely happy and still love being together. I have always been very happy for both of them, and tremendously grateful for him! He did so much for my mom for 5 years until he had some health issues himself, after which he could not care for mom any longer.
My grandpa is 91 and he is in love with his home nurse who is in her early 80s - younger woman. He has dementia but whenever he remembers his home nurse, he keeps saying that he wants to kiss her and tells her that he loves her and he is always ecstatic when she visits him.
I love seeing widows and widowers find new relationships. If my mother found someone else, I would be ecstatic for her. We all need love in our life. Children are children, but people need another type love, too. I would just smile and think that "young love" is wonderful.
My dad began dating 3 months after my mom died. They had been married happily for nearly 65 years. He remarried at 81 and, until his 2nd wife died, they had 6 wonderful years. Now, at 91, he has lived with me for 4 years and I would give anything for him to have the companionship, love, and common interests that he found after my mom died. Grown children who want to control their parents are depriving them of the joys of a full life. My dad's wife wore my mom's bathrobe, used her plates, and even slept on their sheets...all this in "her" house. I had to smile and turn away many times, but now I am glad I did. None of that made any difference in exchange for how happy my dad was. I say, rejoice in the joy of living!
It is about companionship. Understandable you do not want mom displaced, but if this brings him joy, it is a good thing. Wedding vows are til death do you part I am sure he carries your mom in his heart, but he can have another relationship.
My SIL's husband (my husband's sister's spouse) began dating within several months of her death, he remarried about 18 months after her death. Some of the family were stunned and very upset. He had lovingly cared for my SIL for 5 years while she had breast cancer. He had already done much of his grieving prior to her death, grieving the life that they had together that was already lost to them long before she died. Its called Anticipatory Grieving. I don't know if your father's circumstances are similar. Talk with your dad from your heart.
I know that must be so hard for you Daisy! It is difficult to see our parents with someone else. BUT! Dad is probably the practical sort. Knows his wife of many years has passed and not coming back. He is probably lonely and feels that he should enjoy what is left of his life to the fullest and he wants company. Very understandable I think. My other half was a widower who lost his wife in January and we met in April of that year and have been together many years now (actually longer than they were) . I asked him when we met if it was to soon to be dating and he said " No, she loved me and wanted me to be happy! She is gone now and I want a partner and to love and be loved. It is time to move forward, I will never forget her, but I can love someone else as well" . That was his very healthy mind set. I hope in some way that sharing that will help you feel better and give you some comfort. Please talk to your Dad about your feelings, I bet he will say something similar. There can never be to much love in this world! Hugs!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Feels like too soon.....take a deep breath.