Hello many of you I think no my story this is my update would APPRECIATE feedback.Mom was discharged from hospice for 3rd time and been in hospital rehab made few improvements meanwhile I went to elder law attorney found out information I needed to know.Now she has no cathletor and diapers need to be changed she is bed ridden with no sores but feel like I'm starting all over again which now older have own issues plus husband cancer and did not want to do this again she either is pretending trying to make me feel bad by telling all I want to put her in home TRuth is do not want to plus do not feel I can take care of her why do I have to feel bad like this? So she is due to be here this wed but I feel I should start Medicaid app and look for long term spite what she thinks am I wrong is this mean totally care I have given has been 14 years. Mixed feelings. Thank you.
Linda
There are people here who have found that being able to provide care in their own home has not been easy but has been a blessing; there are others that have found it is hell on earth, for reasons out of their control as caregivers; there are some who have found that using a facility lets them stay involved and have pleasant experiences with their loved one much more so than while trying to provide 100% of care personally; there are some who have used facility care and supervised from a distance or even gone no-contact. Any of those options can prove to be the most loving and appropriate choice and there are many things to consider. Without the Medicaid application, you may not have all the options you need. You did well to get the eldercare attorney consultation and that's a huge plus going forward. What mom wants, or thinks she wants, may not be best or might not even be possible. Pray, think, talk with hubby, don't let false guilt eat you up.
I don't see how anyone can take care of a cancer patient AND a dementia patient.you have to look after your own health, or no one will be getting your care or advocacy.
Yes, you should start the Medicaid process tomorrow, while mom is still in rehab. They may be able to assist you and find her a Medicaid - pending bed.
We are none of us Superwoman, although you seem to be doing a pretty good imitation of it! Your first duty is to your husband right now. Mom will do fine in care with you as her loving daughter and advocate. (((Hugs!)))))))