We have planned a vacation for early January, this is first December. My mother isn't eating and drinking little. She drinks her smoothies and candy and she ate Thanksgiving meal that I made, but the doctor called and asked me if I wanted to resuscitate her. It scared me, I am still trying to call back the doctor to ask him more questions. The dietician said she is not eating and is losing weight but the last 4 weeks her weight stayed the same. Should I cancel my vacation? But should we go or stay home?
Re the vacation: Some things to consider -- how complicated are the arrangements for this vacation (i.e., can it easily be canceled), how quickly could you get home; do you think you would be able to enjoy the vacation or would you feel very guilty; what does your spouse think; do you feel you would need to be with her when she passes; are you stressed out from dealing with your Mom's situation and you need to recharge. My personal theory is whatever action you take, you should be at peace with the decision. Kind regards.
As Hedgie wrote, how complicated are the arrangements and can you easily get back if needed? Otherwise, "you should be at peace with the decision".
We cancelled a trip to WDW when mil came to live her final days with us. She often said how she regretted that we didn't get that trip and asked us to promise that after she passed we would take the trip. Even though I promised, she never saw anything concrete. When the hospice nurse told us that mil was possibly lingering longer because of unsettled business, I went online, bought park tickets, and whispered to mil that I'd bought our tickets for WDW. She nodded her head and within an hour she passed. Do I regret cancelling the trip? Nope, no regrets. When we went three months after she passed, there was a peace and joy we would not have had earlier that year.
Vacations can be taken any time. The anticipated passing of loved ones nearing death can't be rescheduled. The loved ones are more important than money and relaxation.
Wow....I can see why both sisters would hold it against each other. The caregiver was left to deal with Mom's death while the other sister was having the time of her life. You are right in that vacation can be taken any time but there is only one Mom. Most likely, the sisters' anger with each other may had hastened their own demise...
PS: I tried to click on helpful answer but it did not go through.
Hard decision. If you go something could happen, if you don't go it probably will not happen. Ask her Dr what he thinks.