I have tried everything from gently explaining to my stepdad of his unhealthy habbits while cooking, such as he often sweats while cooking-drips into food, when his nose gets runny, also drips into food both at the table and being cooked, sneezes directly onto food. Mom litterally stuffs her mouth full of food and talks, sending little chunks of food in various places including me. Her vision is limited and if she drops on the floor-she still uses it. I have tried for a couple of years now to guide, tolerate, and correct the unhealthy habbits as gently as i can. Every time we visit each other food HAS to be involved. I just can not do it any more. I have been to embarressed to share but I need some guidance, can;t take it anymore. Thank you!
Without hurting feelings is to bring your own
Lunch and tell them your on a special diet.
Hopefully they will understand. Maybe even bring
Along some for them to save them from getting
Sick! I do believe thats another thing we lose
When we get older... Taste budds.
Stay healthy...
Worriedaboutdad, I understand all too well your circumstances.
My DH says, well, sorry, he likes that, too. You are out of luck. To put names on things is apparently rude. So I watch while he eats spoon after spoon of wonderful ice cream out of the container, with very few teeth, puts it back without consequence. And his son is, of course, able to push it under the rug whereas I hate my new life.
I don't know how to hide it good enough to where it isn't found. Honestly, I hate so much of this predicament that I am about to throw in the towel and just move somewhere reasonably close.
At least ONE of my siblings, someone with a Masters and a licensed professional, has disgusting habits, too. I have to disinfect door knobs and other surfaces she is likely to have touched while visiting. I've gotten to the point of being obvious about spraying Lysol on surfaces she has touched, especially before she leaves.
She is so self-absorbed she thinks nothing of Dad's health or mine (RA). Both Dad and I have low thyroid, another auto-immune disease.
This sibling, when "washing" dishes just swishes them in dishwater & leaves chunks of garbage on flatware and dishes, and even uses a soiled toilet plunger to clear her kitchen sink of food she puts down her drain - no garbage disposal.
Fortunately, neither Dad nor I visit her any more, and I've asked her to not bring food she prepares. I've seen so much carelessness in her food handling, it makes me nauseous to think of Dad eating her cooking.
She is not allowed to "help" with dishes here because it takes more effort to clean up after her. She would make a big deal about how she helped, then the TRUTH came out when she griped about my putting her results back on the "need to wash" side.
I'm not a fanatic about having sterile surfaces, I just hate spending more of my life fighting illness from their careless habits. BTW, I keep my flatware separate tp prevent soiled hands from contaminating them. I wouldn't even use the generally available items for company if there's any chance dirty hands have been in contact.
Constant sanitizing is time-consuming, but better than getting e coli from one of them.
I like the idea of bring the food and treating it as though it's your treat to them so they don't have to cook. Better yet, I love takeout pizza It's hard to screw up with that. Show up with a box and a bottle of wine and have a party rather than being in a disgusting mess.
After that she became unable to prepare food at all. Now I realize she wasn't able to process why she needed to wash her hands and she couldn't remember if she had nor not. I hope your situation is not as dire.
Your parent's eating habits might be gross but they are still alive, so they must be doing something right.
Look around and you will find rotten food in the fridge, freezer burned mystery objects in the freezer and bugs in the pasta boxes. Throw it out when they are not looking. I would make mom put her "fresh" eggs in cold water, and if they sank, OK, but if they floated they were rotten and I would trash them.