Hello...the bitter sweet phone call from Veteran's Facility with Room Availability Very Soon
Guess you are never really ready for that phone call, anyway, been having strong anxiety over what to tell him why he will be staying there. One family member advised telling him they want to run some tests to see why he keeps forgetting and it will take about a week??? Not sure if right thing to do.
Help???
Both have dementia and so it wouldn't be much use to tell them ahead of time.. or possibly at all. I would need an excuse for taking them...which I haven't really decided on yet. I can just imagine how hard that day will be and I wished I wasn't the one having to go through with it.
I wish you all the luck and that day is as painless as possible for both of you. I do like the idea of telling him they are running tests. I probably would not tell him he would be there a whole week either... I like 'for the time being'... my parents are with it enough to question about everything tho.. what tests? Why? Where are you going?? When will you be back? We aren't sick????
I t is very hard to feel as though you are abandoning a loved one and that you have failed him but this is far from the case so loose the guilt. You are doing what you have decided is the best solution for his long term care. he may say he hates it and ask to come home again but it is best to face up to the truth and simply say a small reason why that is not possible. Getting into an argument and tears will not help either of you. Sending you good thoughts. please come back and tell us how this goes.
And although the truth of it is that this is your loved one's long term care plan, it's also true that it doesn't mean it can never, never be revised come what may. Nothing is ever set in stone, and you will always, always be putting his best interests first.
Also, the more cheerful and positive you are about the move, right here and now, the better it's likely to go for your loved one. Pick out his favourite things for packing; and bear in mind that you don't have to move everything he's ever going to have with him all at once. Do you have a good idea of the room layout?