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Home health recommended that we consider enlisting hospice to help with my dad. He is getting weaker despite PT. He is not eating much, has sun-downers, and has dementia. He currently is in an assisted living facility but I am feeling I need to take him out of there and bring him to my house or take him back to his because since he is becoming less social he is feeling very lonely. Thanks for any help you can give with interviewing hospices.
God bless.

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You need to know how much care will be provided in hours and who will deliver this care. Hospice is no longer what it was when I was in nursing 15 years ago. They now seem to come once a day, say Hi and leave in some cases. You want to know how many hours of care a day, and what kind of care, ie is it a nurse (who you will likely see only for medication adjustment) or an aid for bathing, turning. When the care becomes too much for you, and it WILL, the turning and complete care to keep airway clear, etc. how much MORE care will you be given for those changes. Hospice has become what hospitals are now, interested in how much money they are allotted for you, and how much of that can be pocketed and not spent. I hear there are still some good ones out there and I hope you find one, but I have a friend who is in hospice work, and guarantee you that it isn't what it once was. If you are at ALL able to get in facility care that is the kind you should take, especially as he is already weak. You also want to get clear as his POA for health care what you want. Fluids will keep a patient alive a long time. Months in fact, even when not eating. As fluids are given and the body shuts down it cannot process these fluids in a natural way and they accumulate in the body and in the lungs, causing great discomfort. You want to be clear that you understand that this now is the dying process, that you do not wish misery prolonged if that is the case.
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Luvmydad12 Jul 2019
Thank you so much for your input. I appreciate the insight.
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Luvmydad12, I wouldn't recommend moving your Dad out of the Assisted Living facility. With dementia, it would only confuse him. It is best for him to be in a place where he has a daily routine.

My Dad was shy around people, he preferred to stay in his room reading or watching TV. He always kept his apartment door open so people walking by could say "hi" to him.

As WindyRidge had mentioned, your Dad will need around the clock care. Are you ready to do the work of 3-full caregivers each day? It may work if you have nearby family who are willing to help doing one shift shift. Otherwise, you will need to stay home 168 hours a week. Yikes !!

The hospices usually work the same way. Once a week a nurse will drop by to check vitals, then leave to her next appointment. Once a week a person may come in to bathe Dad. Once or twice a week a volunteer may come in just to chat with Dad for an hour or so. Pain meds will be given to you to give to your Dad if he is at home. Otherwise, the nurse at the Assisting Living will handle the meds.

The hospital here give me a list of Hospice groups in my area. My area has something similar to Consumer's Report but it is geared to the immediate area. I was able to see ratings of the different Hospice groups. I used the same one for both my parents. The hospice group pretty much explained everything at the first meeting, and also handed me a 3-ring binder filled with information. I was pretty much deer in headlights during the meeting, so the binder was so helpful.
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Luvmydad12 Jul 2019
Thank you for your comments. I appreciate the frankness.
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Ask whether they are non profit or for profit. I strongly suggest going with non profit.

Hospice is supplemental care, not 24/7 care. If dad is moved home he will need round the clock care in addition to hospice care.
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