She has help with meals, CNA help, nursing help and is accusing people of being short with her or bossy. She has old food in her fridge, still wants to drive and does on occasion but doesn't recognize places when other people take her. Has a cat she doesn't want to leave. Has been there a long time. She is easily mad and frustrated.
Is there a program that tests seniors and helps them recapture driving skills? When I had my husband evaluated (and he drove head on into traffic on the simulated road) they reported him and the state took his license and his anger. The dead battery route sounds better now. What services are available offering rides for seniors in your area?
An places where some friends have already move to? Visit - is atmosphere what she would come t enjoy?
Moved my husband out to a facility last Monday.So gad I took the tme to really learn about alternatives.
As for driving? Ask th doctor to report him to be he DMV. I've heard of people disconnecting the battery. Not only could be hurt himself but he could hurt others. Good luck but be clever and offer to drive him when The car won't work or arrange for another driving service
Hope this helps?
Sharing experiences is helpful, I think. Offering factors to consider? Also helpful. But advice? No! Unfortunately, you are stuck making these decisions and the ones others made or think they would make are not necessarily best in your situation
Ferris' mother may have soon forgotten, but that does not mean yours will. (My father never did.) "Mom121 thinks . . . anyone with dementia at any stage should not be out on their own." Anyone? Out where? What level of dementia? Demented in what ways? Pretty broad dictum there, Mom121
"If you move her now," write ramiller, "she can become settled before her dementia worsens and its harder for her." Really? Some people become more compliant, more peaceful as their condition deteriorates. (My mother did.) You might be making mom less happy now and gain little in terms of when she finally has to be moved. You might let her stay home until she dies if that is what she says she wants. (That's what my 99 year old mother-in-law says she wants and that's our plan.)
Honestly, from what you wrote, to me your mother sounds more afraid, grumpy, quirky and forgetful than "demented." But I'm just another guy on the internet. I'm also a retired clinical social worker and family therapist and as such, will tell you that is not a good form for offering diagnoses and treatment plans. I want to discourage people from offering advice and firm opinions about life-altering decisions based on so little knowledge about you and yours. Please find a knowledgeable, empathetic counselor you can talk with personally and regularly to help you sort things out. (I've used a spiritually trained counselor to help me with similar issues.)
Good luck and good thinking.
To MOM321, according to the ALZ Association, there is nothing wrong with some with early stages of dementia driving as long as he/she can do so safely.