I will be discussing compensation for POA and caregiving with my mom this week. I do not anticipate it being an issue BUT...my mother has no money other than her SS which is under $800/month. Her mortgage is more than that! She does have significant equity in her home which will be sold at some point. Can I keep a running tab on the hours I spend setting up the POA, AD, Will etc, as well as caregiving tasks, to be reimbursed after the house sells? Also, can I be reimbursed for any $$ I put into the house to make it sellable( its in rough shape but a bit of sprucing/decluttering would help it sell according to the realtor)? Can I be reimbursed for any other costs out of my pocket such a travel expenses (I live 500 miles away), technology fees etc, basically the "cost of doing business"? Attorney fees?
A neuropsychological exam is pending so this all needs to be done quickly. I have no doubt she will be deemed incapacitated at that point.
Please don't think badly of me. I am disabled (cancer) and live on a small fixed income. I also help my adult disabled daughter. I had hoped to return to part time work this spring but I can't juggle that and help mom. There is no one else to help her. Thanks~
You might want to meet with elder law attorney asap & get dpoa done before exam.
Also get youself as signatory on her bank accounts. Having a DPOA helps in documentation to do this, as bank will scan it as item onto her accounts. But bank can add you on as signatory if she asks that to be done. She just needs to appear relatively competent and cognitive to do this request. What usually happens at the bank is that a bank officer will want to speak one-on-one with her as to allowing changes to happen. Like she sits in bank officers room or area with you not next to her.
Can your mom appear competent and cognitive?
If it means she needs to go to beauty shoppe day before and you run through questions or do a couple of go into bank and see a teller situations so she’s all familiar with bank, you may need to think about doing this. But if she’s flat out beyond all this, is obviously on another solar system, appears not to know date or year, then she cannot do POA. That ship has sadly sailed.
About “legal aid”, I’m guessing your thinking that mom (& therefore you) is going to be able to get legal help for free. If that’s your hope, well good luck finding that. Your mom has income and assets (her home), she can afford to pay for an attorney.
In my city (New Orleans), we have 2 law schools, & an hr away up in big BR, there are 2 more law schools. They all have pro-bono clinics, e.g. free or low cost legal help. The ones in NOLA are focused on juvenile justice issues and housing discrimination issues. Some larger cities have probono clinics paid out of city / county budgets and Area Council of Government funding. TX has these but they too are focused on certain issues. You can go to the pro bono clinic but more than likely what you’ll get is a referral list of attorneys who are CELA or NAELA level of elder law expertise as your mom has income and assets to be able to pay for legal work. Imo your best off calling like tomorrow several elder law attorneys to set up initial appointments with ASAP.
To get beyond that you will need to have something drawn up legally that fits your situation in advance of ever getting any $. It is not imho ever a DIY project but needs to be done by an elder law atty. Not DIY.
If you need $ immediately, then a personal needs contract may be the route to go as mom pays you from her SS income. If it more that you’ll likely need to pay for things on the property, then a promissory note or memo of understanding with the property as securitized collateral for the note or memo may be better. So when it sells the mortgage will be the primary securitized leinholder / lender but you will be second. Doing these are not DIYs as they have to get done correctly and recorded at the courthouse if it’s a lien placed and sale of house done while she’s alive. (If she dies then it gets done as a securitized claim against the estate)
If Medicaid is looming to needed for paying for your mom’s care, Medicaid will look any payments to you for 5 years prior to her Medicaid application to see if Medicaid compliant.
But I’m a bit more concerned about your mom’s mortgage situation. Mortgage is a PRIORITY MUST BE PAID situation, & I’m assuming this is a traditional mortgage that she has (not a RM).
How old is she and how many more years till mortgage paid off?
Do you have the actual mortgage agreement?
If not get a copy of it from the courthouse; you reallly need too know what the payoff date is and if any early payoff penalty exists.
You say it has equity, is it - with equity accounted for - above water?
How much realistically could it sell for with no work done?
and would be your mom’s net?
Not to disparage Realtors, but the tendency is to have the most optimistic view of the property based on recent sale comps that are not what your mom’s house is. Realtors show led easily provide your mom a prospective book on the marketplace for selling her home. If the comps are all renovations (listings will be on line w/photos) with granite countertops and rainfall shower heads & your mom’s place has decades of delayed maintenance, it’s not gonna sale for the optimistic price.
If mom’s income is $800 mo & you say her mortgage is more than that, just how is she managing paying her mortgage & all other costs of living? Like she has a big stash of savings?
Really when you say she has equity in the house, how much now & how much when mortgage paid off if it sold?
Is there anyway to use equity now to benefit her, the property & you?
Lots of folks get HELOCs for getting $, but I just don’t know if banks can get underwriting done for a hELOC if they just have only SS as income and not employed. Perhaps others on site have experience with this....???
If she just has $800 a mo, & big mortgage payment, I’m trying to figure out how there is $$ to pay you as a caregiver and pay her bills.
If your getting your own income that’s tied to a disability or you yourself are getting SS, you need to be careful as to income paid to you that may causes issues with your other income. If that exists for you, then getting paid a pittance may be a good thing. It’s something to discuss clearly with the elder law attorney.
As a stray thought, could you possibly move in with her, change your legal residence, & do this for 2.5 years so she stays at her home paying that mortgage & paying it off within 2.5 yrs so that you will qualify for caregiver exemption for Medicaid when she applies in 2.5 years? So you as her caregiver & only heir (her will get codicil for this if need be) get her home that she owns outright with no recovery issues ever for Medicaid?
To me, a Mortgage if their in their 70’s or 80s is horrific. Unless there’s a unique situation that caused one to get a mortgage in their 50’s or 60’s.
Mom received a small inheritance a few years back and teaches a few music students in her home for cash. Amazing that she can still teach but cant seem to remember her facebook password for more than a day. With that said she has less that $2000 in the bank and it will be gone with the next mortgage payment. No idea how she is paying utilities but I know she has received cut-off notices. I'm in contact with APS but they say it has to get worse before they will do more than a home visit now and then.
I cant/won't move to CA. My kids, grandkids and medical team are all here. And my head injured brother is out of control. (Yes, I've called APS on him but they won't do anything). I've considered selling her place and buying something up here and moving in with her but I just dont know if I'm up to the task. My daughter is finally stable and on her own at age 30 and I'm enjoying having me time for the first time ever. And quite frankly my mom may outlive me. However I guess I need to consider all options and the caregiver exemption is tempting.
Ugh. My hats off to all of you amazing caregivers. This is just so sad and hard and make me worry for my own future. Bless you all for your responses. I hope I am able to return the support at some point!
You really need to talk to a lawyer. Office of Aging maybe able to give you the number of Legal Aid. If Mom may need Medicaid of any kind, not sure how that will work.