I am caring for my 93 year old mother in my home! Every day I say I'm going to be more patient, but everyday I find I'm short with her about something. She has a history ever since I can remember of being vey sensitive to any kind of discomfort. All discomfort is a 10 on the pain scale so it's hard to know what is really bad. Her comfort has always been of the utmost importance. She goes from whinning to acting like she's enduring her discomfort to whinning, everything hurts, no strength, have had to ease her to the floor 5 times in a week and if no one is here I have to call 911 to get her up off the floor. It makes me so frustrated.
My parents were professional people who always had their life planned out, and I assume they would have had the where for all to plan into their later years. So I didn't pay attention as they always took care of themselves.
For me, I thought when you became real elderly and couldn't care for yourself at home, that you moved into a place that would take really good care of you. Even now I am so surprised how many people have to take care of their parents either in their own home or in their parent(s) home.
Let's have some compassion for those of us who are having difficulty in doing caregiving.... not every can be a caregiver, just like not everyone can be brain surgeon, a teacher, a farmer, a police officer, etc.
We get some trolls here who come in doing what you did and make their wall private, which you did. They tell us little of themselves, then talk to try to stir trouble. If that is what you are doing, you need a new course in life. If it's not, then start a thread to talk about taking care of your father. We know nothing about him or you.
It's sad seeing our parent(s) this way.... and as we were growing up and wanting to go out in the world, I doubt that our parent(s) were thinking "ah, some day I hope he/she becomes a Caregiver with no life of their own".
I'm glad every day is not like today. I finally had to tell her to leave me alone this evening. I felt bad doing that, but also knew that I had been pushed to the point. Even the most docile pet will react if you poke it with a stick enough times. I didn't have an ounce of patience left in me.
Thanking all who comment and participate in this site. You help us all.
New conversation with Dad.... Dad is now trying gluten-free products as he read that the wheat being grown now [yep, different from the wheat we had a few years ago] could be causing arthritic pain.... so he's trying the gluten-free stuff, and his aches and pains have lessen.... not sure if it is really the wheat or mind over matter, but if he feels better that is a huge plus. Less conversations about Aspercreme, pain pills, heat wraps, etc :)