My uncle is asking another niece, my cousin, to be financial POA, and me to be medical. Neither of us live near him now, but we may all decide it will be best for him to move to where I live. He's working with the lawyer this week to draw up docs. Any cautions about doing it this way? Also, if we did request compensation, what amount would you suggest? From what I've read that would need to be specified in the docs. Any other advice?
My two younger brothers hold POA and MPOA, but really? since mother is in sound enough mind, it doesn't even matter, she can do what she wants. POA ONLY kicks in after the person is declared incompetent to take care of themselves.
You won't "have control" over your uncle, this is good pre-planning, really. He is asking two people he trusts to look after him and finances when/if he becomes incapable of doing so. You don't need to move him nearer to you, unless you want to and he wants to. My brothers take no compensation for their work in mother's behalf--it has been limited to a once a year financial review.
HOWEVER, once she passes, one brother is the executor and he WILL be paid for the time he takes in working out the trust. When someone passes, POA's become null and void.
Have you and cousin talked about what it would mean to both of you and how you would want to deal with things, this could head off a lot of future strife having some upfront ideas of what to expect from one another.
"drained" due to compensation. Must be why your uncle has made his "choices" over who handles financial and who handles medical. I believe in honesty. Sorry. Best of Luck.
The mistake that my precious uncle made is that he made her sole executor of his will, he should have made myself and my sister the executors. So far it has cost myself and my sister over 10 k uk pounds in fighting her. Our lawyer told us that she only did this cause she has the money to do it, “ using our precious uncles money against the people who cared for him” we took expenses quite rightly so, our uncle clearly stated on his POA that we were to be paid a professional salary for being his POA, he stated we could make gifts to his family, give loans etc with no restriction as to amounts etc. We could by sell his property we had full control of everything his care health and well-being and this is now what’s happening to us.
I even have an email from my aunt in America who is the executor to say to me spend spend spend its my brother money and I want him to have the best” Now look what greed has done to innocent people, we have handed over everything all receipts for ever purchase, but she is still not happy with how we spent his money.
She inherited a house 300k painting and antiques £110 k and cash value 200k and that still wasn’t enough. Had we know what she was going to do to us we would have spent more, and probely sold our uncles house and placed him into a better house with a garden for him to go outside easier. We have no money we were not mentioned in his will, we knew we were getting nothing out of it when we took on the role of POA “ we did it beacause we loved and adored him, she has distroyed and still is destroying what little faith myself and my sister have in humanity, she is the most evil greedy person ever. May she burn in hell.
My aunt is a 73 year old woman who is and was very wealth prior to my uncles death. I’ve already had to sell my home here in Scotland to pay my legal cost. Our mother our uncles other sister was also excluded from the will, which we all found very strange, Mum lived directly across the road from uncle peter. Our mother is appalled With her actions towards myself and my sister. Our aunt visited our uncle once in 21months she lives in America, she never see anything we did we visited our uncle every single day traveling 1:15 hours a day to take his shopping and give the live in carers ther 2 hours daily break 7 days a week 365 days a year for over 2 years.
Do cleaning washing overseeing everything, cutting uncles finger and toe nails taking him out for the day, visits to the theater art gallery’s swimming, lunch coffee etc.
So all I can say is do do not do it if you do not want your life distroyed.
Best of luck and let us know.
(Not trying to hijack this post, sorry)
Goodluck. I dont see how it would work if POA an MEDPOA not in same state or in same city. I guess in Texas its diff. All our papers were drew up by lawyer.
I completely disagree with giving 2 different people the different POAs. For the sake of sanity, give medical and financial POA to one competent person.
With the duties split, you get into situations where the medical POA is trying to do what's best for the person medically, be it a surgery or going into an assisted living or nursing home. Maybe you need a scooter chair to give you some more mobility and have the money to buy one. Ooops! They can't do that because the financial POA thinks it costs too much!
So the medical POA spreads themselves thin trying to take care of their loved one themselves, while the financial POA counts beans. That's often what happens. It may not start out that way, but it ends up like that. Think carefully, if you trust someone enough with your health and they make a decision they think is in your best interest, do you want it vetoed because the person you trusted with your money (who may understand little about how to care for sick people) says no? It's so frustrating for your 2 POAs, expending energy trying to communicate, or fight, or whatever, with each other - instead of caring for you and your interests.
There's also the situation where the financial POA thinks or knows they are in the will, and this colors their decisions on how much your medical POA is allowed to spend. Sure, you try to pick someone you can trust, but they may not even realize a little greed is creeping in there, causing them to veto things your medical POA thinks will improve your life. After all, since they're not your medical POA they can't see first-hand how much this expenditure can improve your comfort.
I'm POA for my loved one, and I'm forever grateful that I don't have to ask anyone else if I can do for him what I believe is best!
When I get on in years this is a lesson I hope I never forget.
If you MUST use this "checks and balance" approach, write in some mechanism for solving disputes between the POA and MPOA (i.e., a respected third party, other siblings, or a named elder care mediator).