I'm an only child with widower dad. His Parkinson's took a sharp decline in just the past few weeks with more serious dementia issues arising, even to the point of safety concerns if left alone - particularly when combined with sundowner's syndrome. I can't always be home, am working on in home and/or placement care services (trying to start the qualification process) but the rapid acceleration of the decline has me in need of a more immediate solution than the traditional routes might take. Has anyone faced a similar issue and/or have any ideas to help? Thanks so much!
This is sometimes called a "social admit" or ER dump.
You need to be firm, possibly to the point of appearing callous, that you can not care for him.
I tried putting in some Alexa cameras, but even when I've called to stop him from doing something I was seeing it hasn't gotten him to stop... then he doesn't hang the phone up completely so I can't call back and talking to him on the camera hasn't gotten him to stop either.
I want to add to this. If you do call 911, give them a legitimate reason why he needs to go. In my case, my father kept getting up and trying to put his coat on, so I told the police officer and the police officer recommended bringing him to the hospital (he said he didn't want to be called a few hours later needing to look for a wandering elderly man). Perhaps you can tell them he's delusional and you are afraid for your and his safety. But you have to be convincing that he needs to go.
Does he live with you?
Have you used any caregivers to date? Any family who could help you while you work to get him the care he needs?
Ask around for advice for private caregivers. There may be someone recommended by a friend of a friend that is available NOW to come over to help him. You could find a local facebook group and post the question for a suggestion for a caregiver - there are usually lots of responses to people looking for recommendations.
I think you are working outside of the home and if so you are going to take some time off from work. I wonder if this would qualify as an FMLA event so that you would not be "punished" for taking time off. As others stated, you can not leave your dad alone at this point. So until you get your long term solution in place, unfortunately, the work falls upon your shoulders.
Best of luck.
He does live with me. I did have a friend come when I was gone for a week and during that time his condition radically worsened, though with a medication adjustment things returned to where they had been prior to this recent decline. (Private caregiver found basically as described.)
There's no other family around- all have moved out of state in recent years. I have a few friends that would try to help, but who like me work and really can't do anything.
Good luck to you.
Your father should not be left alone. Cameras won’t stop him from doing anything harmful.
My mom tried to walk out of the front door in the middle of the night.
I don’t know if your dad has an issue with balance. It’s very common for Parkinson’s patients to struggle with balancing. Falling became an issue for my mother.
What meds does your dad take for Parkinson’s? My mom took Sinemet. Sometimes I would hear her screaming in her sleep because she had vivid dreams as a side effect of the meds. Mom didn’t sleep very well throughout the night.
She was prescribed Seroquel and that helped. In hospice they also gave her Ativan. When she was near death they removed her Sinemet and added morphine. She died peacefully in hospice.
There are so many issues regarding Parkinson’s disease and dementia that make being alone dangerous for your dad. Don’t risk his safety.
Speak with your dad’s physician or a social worker to help with deciding on the best options for a care plan. He needs around the clock supervision.
You could also ask his Parkinson's team, because lots of their patients will have been in this situation; or research local Parkinson's-related special interest groups. It's a matter of networking.
The service I work for is responsible in theory for providing this kind of short-term support in our county, but at the moment we're spread so thin that by the time we get round to assessment the problems have often resolved themselves :(
Taking him to the ER is a good idea if you have a legitimate concern. The social worker on his floor if admitted can very quickly get him placed in long term care.