I'm the caregiver for my mom with mid stage AD. She is on behavior meds for sundowners and anxiety. Just had a med increase. She has gotten worse in the past month insisting she can go home. That can't happen because she refuses any outside help and Drs and state said she can't live alone. She ask me questions constantly about her things I answer her then get blamed for answering her sharply although I don't think I am (I've watched all teepa snow and applied where I could) she doesn't redirect well even hospital said good luck. Lately she's been saying she doesn't want to go to NH then says she doesn't want to be a burden and wants to go to memory care then gets mad at me and says she can't help her confusion. I've told her I love her want to help and I'm doing the best I can . Guess I just needed to vent.
Each time I think back on how we could have done things better I bump back into the reality that she wouldn't have wanted it and I have to be satisfied with how it all played out.
I agree with the others. You are doing the best you can. Check in with yourself often and know that and take good care of yourself as well as your mom.
Caring for an elderly parent is one the hardest things anyone can do. I think between the side effects of the medication and the changes happening in the brain, its a very hard disease to manage.
After my dad's stroke, I, too felt like I couldn't do anything right. I tried to make my dad happy, but it was a hard go. I kept him at home till he passed in the hospital. But I sometimes wonder if he would have been better in a nursing home.
The main thing is that you have to do what's best for your mom, for her own safety and your sanity. I wish you the best of luck.