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I worked there for over a year . I got attached (you build bonds with the people) and I get banned because I quit . Please tell me they can't do this.

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They can ( and many will). You left their employment. Do you expect them to "welcome" your visit with open arms?
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sp196902 Nov 2023
I agree.
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No, you should not visit a care facility where you formerly worked.
If you got attached to co-workers, then text them, have lunch, meet them at a nearby coffee shop or whatever.
If you got attached to residents? That's inappropriate. As a professional and a paid professional you are to divide your feelings of fondness away from your work. You are there to perform a duty and as that duty involves living human beings, you will naturally form a bond of trust and closeness. THIS IS TO END AS YOU EXIT THE DOOR. It isn't appropriate to make clients who are honestly "patients" your friends. You may indeed feel great compassion. As an RN there were times when I cried to the broken hearts and bodies of my patients. This I did behind closed doors.

Seniors, particularly, in caregiving situations, are vulnerable. They count on us for our PROFESSIONAL compassion and expert care. But we are not families and should not attempt to become so.

That you have been ASKED not to visit means that your visits are viewed with suspicion.
Were I you, I would ask to sit with and speak with an admin.
I would pose the question you have here posted to us.
They will explain to you some of the rules of caregiving.

I wish you the very best. I had many instances as a nurse when patients would ask to see me outside my job setting. Out of professional concern I declined.
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Interesting question. To be honest, it is a question that I would have never thought about before.

I have never worked in healthcare so I have no firsthand experience in this field as far as knowing their policies regarding past employees.

I tend to agree with Alva though. If I were living in a facility I would expect my caregivers to be professionals. Caring? Yes, but I would want them to remain working as a professional staff member.

I do remember hearing an interesting NPR interview where a social worker at a hospice facility said that he was trained to not become attached to the residents.

He said that it was impossible for him to do his job without personally connecting to the residents. So, I suppose that this social worker was an example of someone who did form strong bonds with the residents.

In your situation, I think you will have to respect the policy of the facility. Know that they are being cared for by others now. They are no longer your responsibility.

Are you still working in the healthcare field? Have you considered volunteering in some way to help people in need. I’m sure that you could find something that would be of interest to you.
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AlvaDeer Nov 2023
You DO become personally attached, Need, I assure you.
You simply understand that you cannot carry that attachment past discharge.
I have so many patients and families I will never forget. They are a part of me. Jess, who was my first AIDS patient, and his loving Mom. Stella who used to lob her cane at me. Mr Albright whose cabbie when he was discharged was so mean I ended crying in the coffee room for 15 minutes. So many I knew going home to minimally good circumstances, with so many needs.
You become VERY attached.
You simply cannot go there. You are NOT taught not to get attached; you are taught that your caring must remain professional.
I can SEE the caring from my beautiful doctor when she tells me this year it is two decades she has been my doc (since retirement); I have seen her go out on her pregnancy leaves, and know her daughters are growing up while I grow old. But no, no dinners, no lunches out. Not even a coffee.
There is a sort of unwritten code; you either get it or you don't when you work in caregiving. It is the same with fostering pets. After I place an animal who has lived with me perhaps as long as a year, it belongs to the next couple. They want a free pet sitter, they can call. A few I see. Most I don't. The pet has gone on to another life. One I helped him get has to be my satisfaction.

Most caregivers are taught all of this right away. Our OP needs to learn it to her core to be good at what she does. IMHO.
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