My wife does not like the caregiver I hired....going on 3 weeks....
She has made things up, some things may have been confabulations...I am not sure...
Today, she talked in the mirror and said that she had told me numerous times that she does not want her back in the house and this time she needs to make sure it happens.
As I discussed all her claims today with her she started regressing backwards in behavior...behaviors that had improved, started regressing...
It doesn’t do me any good to have a helper if I spend my time picking up the pieces.
I really have a hard time believing that this particular behavior is the Alzheimers....seeing as this is not a new behavior.
She has moderate short term memory loss...so she can still hold a reasonable conversation....
What are your experience with manipulation?
Thanks
I agree with realyreal......what they were before dementia is what they are now, only much worse.
Your wife probably does not want anyone but YOU to be her care giver, which is unfortunate, because that's not possible. Let her know that she WILL be having a care giver for X hours per week, like it or not, because you have things to do, etc. So if she does not like care giver A, we will move on to care giver B, but once we get to care giver C, we're done. Three strikes and you're out, dear. And if that turns out to be a total disaster, you can remind her there's always Memory Care communities you can consider instead. Not as a 'threat' but as a point of fact.
Good luck!
If you think that she is aware you could tell her that you need the help and to please play nice.
I hope that you can find a solution soon.
I honestly believe that he knows full well and works really hard to stay ahead of it. He does really well too. But he can be very difficult because he wants things his way and refuses to acknowledge any memory deficit, he will make things up to match what he wants you to believe. It's a wild ride to be sure and I don't live with him.
One thing that is consistent with him, he doesn't care how others are affected, it is ALL about him.
Maybe she needs a firm statement from you.
She has made outrageous accusations...She was talking to the mirror today and said that she has told me many times not to let her in the house and she needs to make sure she doesn’t come back....
The issue is isolation...she needs someone around so when I go somewhere she isn’t lonely....
The isolation has really hurt her...
As she progresses in the disease I can understand how this behavior can go away...but not at this juncture...
She doesn’t believe I beed help...