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He makes 31,000 a year and is on Medicaid. He wants me to take care of him. I have been doing this for sometime for free. All his cooking, house care, transportation, laundry, shopping, everything. How do I get paid for this service? I don't know where to start.

Your roommate should be paying you. If he hasn't yet, then he most likely never will.

You should tell him that it's way beyond your abilities to take care of him. It is, and he's going to get sicker, and then who helps you?

I'm sorry for his situation, but at this point you need to take care of yourself. It's easy to get caught up in "I'm a kind person, and this is what a kind person should do." Then you're trapped. Please don't let that happen to you.
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Reply to Fawnby
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You cannot care for this person. Don't even try. He needs to talk to Medicaid and see if he can get in home help. Social Services to see whats out there for him. If he needs this much help, he may need to go into LTC.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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You won't get paid. At least, not for everything that you're doing for him now or would be doing in the future. If he starts paying you it will look like gifting to Medicaid and he is in danger of losing this important support. He doesn't have enough money to pay you for what he needs. The more you insert yourself the longer it takes for an appropriate care solution to be put into place.

He should consider getting assessed as needing LTC in a facility where he will get all the medical and custodial care he needs. Medicaid plus his SS income would cover all of it if and he's already on Medicaid so he'd just need to qualify as needing LTC.

Eventually he's going to need more care than he can receive in his home or you are willing/able to provide. He should not wait for a health crisis to get things in place. If you are not his PoA and he doesn't have one, then eventually when he's very sick the county will assign him a legal guardian and they will move him into a facility for appropriate care.

Do not stay to help him on the promise of being paid later. Start thinking about your own future when you need a new place to live when (not if) he goes into a facility. Start looking now. Your roommate has other solutions, they're just not ones he prefers.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Your roommate should be spending at least some of his $31,000 income to pay you.

What does he get now from Medicaid? It may work better if he gets a carer paid by Medicaid - even in a nursing home if he qualifies for that level of care - and you keep a job. How ill is he? Is your future going to include him in the long term?
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Reply to MargaretMcKen
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JoAnn29 Jan 30, 2025
Really! 31k comes out to about $15 an hour. Not a living wage in the US. The complexes where I live charge about $1400 a month for 1 bedroom. Thats almost half of what this person makes. And if 31k is gross he is making less. Its not cheap here to live right now.
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What state are you in? Some states have a program called IHSS (In Home Supportive Services) in which a Medicaid recipient who qualifies can receive caregiving from a person they choose. My understanding is the pay is not high and the hours may not be full time. It may not be a good fit for you.

Does your friend have a social worker helping arrange his care? If not I think contacting your county’s Health and Human Services department to get any possible help for him might be a good first step.

Best wishes to you and your friend!
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Reply to SnoopyLove
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Do you have a paying job? If so you should keep it.

What are the details of yours and his situation? What is his prognosis?

Just because he wants you to be his caregiver doesn't mean that you have to.
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Reply to MG8522
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