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The nursing home I am in has a bad problem of leaving med carts unlocked and meds generally unsecured. This led to a resident suffering from depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideations being able to take med cards from the cart to self-medicate and eventually attempt self-harm. The resident had lost their best friend in January and was in a bad mental and emotional state.



After a stay of 9 days in the hospital, the resident was on a medication protocol that was working and the resident was getting better everyday. The nursing home, surprisingly, invited the resident to come back. They said he had been a great asset to the home except for this problem he had had.



However, after he came back, within 3 days, they took away 2/3 of the meds the hospital had him on...including the ones for anxiety and the one that helps him cope with any cravings for pills or alcohol. Then, one night he mentioned to a supervisor he trusted, that he wanted to be more proactive about advocating for himself and the other residents. He said that if he saw dereliction or neglect or abuse, he was going to report it. He said he had been scared to say anything before, but he wanted to help make the place better.



The next day, the social worker told his counselor in front of a room of people, that the two of them needed to get together and talk about how to get him out of the building as soon as possible.



After that point, the level of care had gone down even further, including no adherence to diabetic diet, fixing plumbing/toilets in the room, lack of checking blood sugar or giving meds as scheduled. The staff has also been rude and dishonest. Just yesterday, he was in the shower, and an aide who wanted to use the shower banged on the door loudly 10 or 12 times and yelling "Who the hell is in there?" When he made it out, she swore she was just joking.



For the past week or two, a two nurses have offered to give him pain meds and ativan in order to "help him" even though they know he has struggled with addiction, and can possibly be kicked out if he takes drugs that are not prescribed.



Now, they are forcing him to leave today and go to a half-way house for people doing drug treatment and on methadone. He hasn't received a 30 day notice, nor are they able to answer even basic questions about where he should go.



Can they kick him out like this? Can he just say no to leaving? He has lived here for 3 years and been a model resident. What can be done?



BTW, he has audio/video of a nurse just giving him 2100 mg of Gabapentin, unsolicited and un-prescribed.

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Report them to their state licensing board AFTER getting him out of there. I don't know why you'd want a loved one in a facility that doesn't want him. Get him out immediately.

I don't know that the audio/video is admissible, since many states require the permission of both parties before recording. Check your state's laws on that one.
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dear OP,

i don't know all the details -- but i want to warn you, even when one is 1,000,000% right, it is almost impossible to win in court against a nursing home (NH). they have many lawyers, and know just what to say, to get out of any legal trouble.

i know several NHs where residents (and family) are indeed scared of speaking up, because of potential retaliation. i know nurses who work in NHs, who told me they themselves will never put their family member there, because they know how badly the residents are treated, and the residents are indeed treated even worse if the residents (or family) speak up. (i'm sure there are great NHs in the world; i'm just talking about the NHs that i know).

my advice:
if an NH is trying to get rid of you, although it's a lot of work, it's better to put in the effort and find a new NH. if you try to fight it, or stay in the old NH, you won't be treated well by people who don't want you there.
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Are you a Staff member? You seem to know alot about this resident. And yes they can ask him to leave. I don't think NHs have 30 day notices.

My daughter has worked in NHs for 20 yrs.

First, no LPN or RN can give meds that are not prescribed by a doctor. So if ther is a problem where his drugs have been dropped you talk to the DON or to the Doctor who prescribed them.

Second, the pharmacy is not on site. So any medication ordered needs a prescription. And only "those" prescriptions are in the building. Everytime a med is given to a resident the time is written down and initialed. There is no stockpiling of medication. So he is not getting anything thats not prescribed by the doctor. Nurses are just following doctor's orders. If the State does an inspection, there should be a prescription for every pill in that facility and ever prescription better have a resident associated with it.

If the medcart is left where residents can get to it, I too would complain. But you are blaming the Nurses when the Doctor is the one who prescribes the medication. Don't expect them to "know" that certain meds the resident is addicted to.

"Then, one night he mentioned to a supervisor he trusted, that he wanted to be more proactive about advocating for himself and the other residents."

Thats all the NH needs is a resident advocating for other residents.  If a resident becomes a problem, then yes, they can ask him to leave.
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Speak to an ombudsman.
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Would this be the same Model Resident who is stealing drugs from the med carts in the nursing home????
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I had to deal with an awkward situation when my mom went into rehab. I was an advocate for my mother. I went to see her on a regular basis during her stay, just about daily.

One morning when I arrived, I could see that she was troubled. This was highly unusual because my mother was always very pleasant to the staff and they loved her.

Mom said, “Honey, I have to speak with you about something. Yesterday evening, the nurse who was on the evening shift gave me two doses of my Parkinson’s medication instead of one. I immediately told the nurse that I only take half the amount she was giving me.”

The LPN told her, “Well you have two doses left and if you take both doses now, I won’t have to come back to your room later.”

So, mom asked if taking both would hurt her. The nurse told her, “No, it’s not going to hurt you.” So, mom not wanting to question her authority, reluctantly took it.

Oh boy, I am sure that you can guess that I wasn’t happy with this situation and told my mom that I would handle it. My mom was afraid of being mistreated by her if I reported her.

I told mom, “I am going to handle it. Please trust me.” Mom smiled and nodded okay. I called mom’s pharmacist and asked her if a double dose would harm her. She said, “Not if it only happens once but more than that, yes, it would be a problem.

Please report this nurse because if she is doing this to your mom, chances are she is doing it to others too.”

I went straight to the DON and explained the situation. The DON responded with, “I am going to speak with the LPN on last night’s shift and get back to you.”

I said, “Great. Thanks!” The LPN admitted everything. She was not allowed to ever go back into my mother’s room.

I love nurses! They are our best friends when we need help. Not all nurses are angels though. In our situation, the DON was excellent and handled the matter very well.

Just because a patient is elderly doesn’t mean that they are wrong and that the nurse is automatically right.

I don’t think mom’s nurse who purposely double dosed my mom was fired. I didn’t want her to lose her job. I wanted her to do her job well.

Mom’s LPN caused my mom to be stressed about taking two doses and she upset me too.

You’re doing the right thing by having this situation investigated. Hopefully, the ombudsman will find out the facts for you.

My mom wasn’t an addict and she had this unfortunate experience. Nurses are trained to deal with addictions and how to dispense medications.

It’s a shame if a nurse doesn’t do his/her job properly. The vast majority of nurses are fantastic. Every profession will have some workers who don’t do a satisfactory job.
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What does your counselor say about the situation?
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in fact OP, just adding to what i wrote below, we have never seen anyone on the forum write back and say, "hey guys, i won my lawsuit against the facility."
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What a tragedy for him. I’m so sorry that he is going through this.

Addiction is a disease. It’s so sad that the nursing home hasn’t been considerate of his issues and then they want to throw him out! Wow!

Have you spoken with the DON about this? Or an ombudsman in your area?
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The DON and administration can't be trusted. They are the ones who told him he had to leave after he admitted to hoarding the pills, then sent him to a psych ward where they said that was more than welcome to come back to the facility as a long-term resident as long as he took meds as prescribed, was willing to do group counseling meetings 3 times a week, and he be supervised. The DON is the one who told him everything would be fine...all the while planning on kicking him out as soon as they could be considered non liable for his situation.

I called and wrote the ombudsman yesterday...have not heard back.
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NeedHelpWithMom Jun 2023
I hope that you will hear back from them soon. Best wishes to you.
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