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I really don't know if this is a correct caption or not. I've discussed this before but it was titled about Mom's bout with pneumonia leading to bathroom problems. Now it has turned into a game! Every evening after I put her to bed, she gets up and goes and sets on the toilet, does not pee or anything, wipes, flushes and sometimes washes her hands, sometimes not. My husband and I lost track after 20 times last night! Once I went in and asked her what her problems was and her answer was, "I'm going back to bed" ??? I just left the room and she kept doing it. Most of the time she peeps out her bedroom door to see where I am or what I am doing. It is a wonder that our water bill isn't $500.00 a month from her playing in the water! Has anyone else ever experienced this or have any suggestions of how to keep her in bed. She wears me out! Oh, I forgot to mention that she doesn't go to the bathroom when she is up during the day except maybe once or twice . HELP! Any ideas will be appreciated!

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My mom is obsessed with dish washing, and does not do a good job. I go through a bottle dish detergent a wk. I have hidden the dt and she washes them without it. Asked her to not concern herself with the dishes because they will be placed in dish washer, still she washes them. I've given up, just buy dollar store brand and allow her to wash till she content! Mom was getting up after being put to bed as well, and calling out for me. So I now give her a cup of sleepy time extra tea and 12.5 mg benardryl to ensure we all get a good nights sleep.
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Does Mom getting up at night need to involve you? Can she handle it all on her own? If so, what happens if you just totally ignore the behavior? I suspect it will not last the rest of her life -- she'll develop some other behavior that may annoy you more or less, but at least it will be different. Just as BEACHES humors her mother's dishwashing obsession and capnhardass lets his mom make her bed between naps, maybe Mom's sitting on the toilet is not the worst thing she could be up to.
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if you try to understand irrational behavior it will be you who goes bonkers. my mother was never big on housekeeping but in the last couple of years she is obsessed with emptying out and cleaning cabinets. she takes naps at different times both day and night and meticulously makes up her bed between each nap. i suppose she needs a routine to compensate for her deteriorating thought process.
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This could be a horrible idea or a great one- I really don't know- but what if you turn off the water to that bathroom at night? -- or just buy one of those plastic triangle do-hickies they use in public bathrooms that say "cleaning" and put it in the doorway night. Before bed say- "bathroom is being cleaned tonight - do you need to go now because it is closed until morning"
AGAIN I WARN YOU THIS COULD BE A HORRIBLE IDEA but if you are at your wit's end and your Mom is at the point where compassionate lying is necessary it MIGHT be worth a try. Most likely, if it does work, she will find another way to drive you nuts. It may be her only entertainment. It may make her feel in control of a situation she is not in control of. It is hard to tell with dementia.

OR she may have developed a fascination with water. There are toys that have water in them that moves things around- like the wave machine- maybe buy her one of those? My daughter loves the movement of water and we went through many toys that had water or a gel like substance that dripped slowly and really quite hypnotizingly (sp?) around. There is also that old toyfrom the 70's- maybe 80's - they make it again- I know because I bought one for my girl a few years back- it is a water filled container with rings that when you push these big buttons (they are big- easy to manipulate) a puff of air makes the rings shoot up and you try and make them land on hooks. It is just fun to push the buttons and see the rings jump around. (my daughter has special needs- we buy lots of soothing toys for her) Just throwing out ideas hoping one sticks. Good luck!!!
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You could put bricks in the tank and reduce the water per flush. Old cheapskate's trick. Not really recommended, but in this situation maybe a good idea.
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Thanks for all your input! It is all greatly appreciated. Yes, the thought has run across our mind that she is obsessed with water. I ran to the post office and my husband said she went to the bathroom and then washed her hands, came out and went to the kitchen sink and washed them again! Yes, I agree, setting on the toilet is not the worst thing she could be doing. We also think it gives her the opportunity to check and see where I am and what I am doing. She will open the door and say "Good Night" or "I'm going to bed now". I am slowly learning to ignore her, but sometimes it gets kind of irritating. We have thought about turning off the water to the commode. We also went through the dishwashing thing until her last hospital stay, basically the same thing with the dishwashing liquid or else no soap. Her nose would run, and she would wipe her nose and swipe the dishes. Sorry, I don't mean to be gross, but they immediately went into the dishwasher the minute she wasn't looking. Just now, 15 min after she peed and I tucked her into bed, she was up again on the pot and came to her door and hollared at me and told me to put her to bed again. I said," I just put you to bed, what were you doing up again?""I went to the bathroom and I told her she just peed a minute ago". She just looked at me dumbfounded and I tucked her in and told her to stay tucked in. If you come up with any more suggestions, they will be greatly appreciated and thanks for the comments you have already given me. Til next time, thanks!
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chloesgrams2012 What I am thinking is... your Mom may be in bed and thinking Oh I better go to the bathroom before I go to sleep (if she has done this just before she went to bed... you know it, but she may not remember it) so she gets up and goes, than lays down and has the same thought and repeats the same process because she does not remember what she has just done. Or could it be that she just gets restless after you go to sleep because it gets quiet and gets up thinking it's morning or simply out of habit, so she just goes into the bathroom "just because" that's the first things she has done for years and since her childhood, she's been getting out of her bed, then goes to bathroom. Or she could be feeling the sensation of having to pee for a medical reason, for example kidney stones or could she be constipated and can't relieve herself. If she's having mental issues it could be a real feeling to her because her brain is sending this message because of the mental disorder.
On the humorous side.... I always say my Mom's biggest problem is finding the bathroom. She's always looking for it, like it's going to go somewhere and she wants to make sure it's there.
I have a feeling this will be a wanted situation in the future... at least she uses the toilet and not diapers or a plant even worse the floor.
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You have some great thoughts! All of those have crossed my minds, but I don't know which one to choose! LOL! We have ruled out the medical condition, because when she is awake and setting up, she goes to the bathroom to pee and have a normal bowel movement, but a whole lot less times. I do think it is what you said about her laying in bed and thinking that she needs to go to the bathroom before she goes to sleep, and doesn't remember doing so. She wears Depends, but doesn't use them unless she has had an illness or her mind is really bad at that time. If we didn't have the humor with our Mom's, we would really be in a bad shape. That is so funny about your Mom keeping check on the bathroom so it doesn't go anywhere. I seriously think Mom is obsessed with water and the bathroom. Her mind gets worse every day. Thanks for the input. You have some really good good thoughts.
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Didn't aim to repeat my last sentence! But then again, I have to stop and think to make sure I don't repeat stuff. I think it's called STRESS, LOL!
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