My sister claims that she has a letter from my mother's physician claiming some type of incompetency. When I called the doctor's office I was told there is nothing like this documented in her file anywhere. My sister has worked for this doctor under the table for 8 years. First of all, shouldn't this document have been in mom's chart for all to see? Second of all, if it's not in her chart as the office says can I fight this letter saying it is a "conflict of Interest" and my mother should be evaluated elsewhere?
Where is your Mom now? I would have an independent analysis done. The other thing I am leary of is doctors who have absolutely no training in diagnosing Alz or Dem. This happens because it is a completely anecdotal evaluation and docs, who are not as adept, are just bending to the will of the family in order to have their loved one committed.
At 82, your Mom shouldn't have to deal with this (or you as well). Bless you for not letting anyone take advantage of her.
Your sister's attempt to control issues may have started out of love, but your mother deserves to be fought for and given every opportunity to let the doctors discover what is best for her. Bless you for protecting your mother. I know it is not easy and feelings fluctuate between anger and questioning your own decisions. I discovered that as long as you have the ability to look at the situation from your parent's perspective, you can handle what has to be done. Best wishes!
You have to protect yourself and your mother. When she died, they have been using their positions as doctors to lie about the medical records and claim my mother was not sick, even though I have all of the medical records to prove it, including all of the doctors and nurses, neighbours, etc. She had over 49 hospital admissions and 76 ER visits.
My advice is protect yourself and your mother. Greed and money and death do terrible things to people. The most educated people can become greedy little children. My experience has also taught me that as a caregiver you are vulnerable and unprotected. Protect yourself and get your mother to help protect her and herself. There are various levels of capacity. A person may not remember what they ate for breakfast, but they still can understand how they want heir finnaces conducted or that they want to die at home. Protect your mother and yourself from the non-caregiving siblings...especially the ones with the medical degress....the courts will believe the heresay statements of a doctor over the factual evidence of a caregiver with all of the witrnesses, at least that has been my experience....don't end up like me...protect yourself as a caregiver....you are worthy!!!