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This week has been horrible, as you are all aware. Today the neighbors came by and low and behold, she acted normal. I told the neighbors what was going on and how I am placing her. It seems everyone is against it and thinks I'm a horrible person. They don't see what goes on 24/7, but I feel guilty on days like this when she acts normal. Am I going the right thing?

Doing the right thing?
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Reply to Rogerwyatt7890
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Yes you are, hang in there!
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Reply to pamzimmrrt
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Yes Roger, I'm not there so I can't say for sure, but from everything you have said you definitely are doing the right thing. And I hardly ever say that they need to go to AL like others do, but in your case I think definitely.. not that others are wrong that's just not the first thing on my mind like the people that have been doing this forever

I'm having a difficult week to, dealing with a bit of guilt to, and a lot of family issues. So we all have those days
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Rogerwyatt7890 May 23, 2024
Thank you. I think the hardest part of this whole process is the guilt. Today she is a sweet as pie and yesterday was a total different monster type person. It is so crazy. The heater in the basement started making a really loud noise last night. I went down there and it was flashing red lights like it was going to blow. I went back upstairs and looked at the furnace and she had it blasting at 92 degrees. No poor heater was working overtime and wanted to explode. This is stuff that I cannot always see or know is happening if I am outside or sleeping. Very scary. It is like 80 today and she has the gas furnace on and the heater ARGGGG. I'm dying but I keep telling myself only a few more days. I just want to guilt to go away and I know when we take her to the facility she will have a really hard time adjusting.
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If you are placing her because she will get care 24/7
If you are placing her because her care is more than you can manage SAFELY.
If you are placing her because you want the best for her.
Then you are doing the right thing.

I always said when I was caring for my Husband that I was "ruled" by 2 major organs. My HEART and my HEAD.
There were some decisions that I had to rely on my HEAD to make and hope that my HEART would understand.
Those are the tough decisions.

If you are doing the best you can that is all anyone can ask of you...including yourself.
Tell your neighbors to go pound sand!
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Rogerwyatt7890 May 23, 2024
LOL go pound sand that is sooo funny. Thanks for the comment made me laugh hard.
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What your mother is doing when the neighbors stop by is called showtiming. It's very common with folks with dementia. But sadly they can only showtime but for so long and then they resort back to their true self.
Only you know if you're doing the right thing, but know that your mother is only going to get worse.
So tell her neighbors that if they'd like to take on her care so she doesn't have to be placed, to go right ahead.
You need to get back to your life and your grandson, before you lose too much more time with him. You will NEVER get that time back.
So quit prolonging the inevitable.
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Rogerwyatt7890 May 23, 2024
I understand I have to do this it is just heart breaking. She is going to memory care also and the room is sooo small. She is going to lose it. She has always been used to this huge 3 story house. That is all she knows. I'm just terrified she will act out and they won't accept her or something. I'm just a worry wort but I am not backing down and she will definitely be placed. In the long run after things calm down, we will all be ok. She keeps asking me if I am going to lock her up.
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Your mother recently tried to push you down the stairs . You are doing the right thing . Your mother now needs a village to take care of her . You are only one person. Had she successfully pushed you to your death , where would she be ??She would end up in a facility , that’s where .
Place Mom so you are both safe and you can be a less stressed advocate , and daughter to visit .
Don’t tell the neighbors your family business. They have no understanding of what it’s like .
No guilt . You did not cause your mother’s illness.
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Reply to waytomisery
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AlvaDeer May 23, 2024
I know. I say bring the neighbors over to commiserate with Mom and put them between her and the stairs!
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You didn't cause her to get old.
You have done your best.
She will be safe & professionals will handle her.
(your neighbors can shove it)
ALMOST THERE.....STAY STRONG!
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Reply to Dawn88
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Tell the neighbors they're welcome to take her to live with them. That should shut them up.
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AlvaDeer May 23, 2024
Oh, I doubt it SP. They will just come back with "Well it isn't OUR mother or we WOULD". You know the type, right? There's no getting away from it. Best to pat their silly hands sweetly and say "I know dear. This is so distressing for you. But you will recover". And move on.
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No, of course they don't see it, Roger. They aren't there.
You didn't cause your mom's dementia, and you can't fix it.
And you really can't expect others to have even the slightest idea of her condition.
And it isn't their business no matter how "nosy" they want to be.

Simply smile, tell them "You really aren't living with this, so I understand you mean well, but really, this is not your business to judge. I am so thankful you love and care for her, and I hope that means you will visit her and love on her with lots of frequency."

You can't make everyone happy. You need now to make you mom safe and make yourself and your life whole again. I know you have a pretty good "take", a "good read" if you will on human psychology overall. You understand that people WILL do this. It's easier to be mad at you than sad about her. You cannot possibly explain every little thing to every little person.

You are heading into grief here, but not guilt. Guilt infers cause and a refusal to fix things that are fixable. This isn't, and will only get worse.

You are very engaged on this site. I know you have read lots already on this old "guilt dilemma" and on how people judge others. We recently had an OP who was in 80s trying long as she could to care for hubby, whose own KIDS were judging her. Luckily you have the marvelous support of your DD.
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Rogerwyatt7890 May 23, 2024
Thanks "nosy" lol.
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I think It is very Hard for a adult child to admit their Parent is sick and You have to make the decisions for them . No One expected this turn of events . I think Its funny we allow people to have a Voice In Our decision Making Process as we are the Only Ones doing the work and Usually alone . My Sister went around telling People " I Placed My Mom In a sh*tty Nursing Home. " It was a Great NH . Did My sister spend One day helping with My Mother " No " she was too Busy . I Took Care of My brother for a year and a half she had the nerve to say " I did a terrible job . " Did she spend One day with Him while he was sick ? No . So These people are not On Your Journey and your doing the best you Can . I think you know you are at your Wits end . Burn Out is tough to recover from . It is a sad situation . No way around it . You will get your strength back and Pat yourself On the Back for the courage you have maintained to stay present .
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Reply to KNance72
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Rogerwyatt7890 May 23, 2024
Thank you.
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I understand exactly how you feel! It is a long story but many many people in my town plus some family members have criticized me about my dad because I have not moved in with him. People like this have no idea what a caregiver goes through. I have no siblings so it has been tough!. Today he moved to a facility and he seems to finally be ok with it. But I have to admit, I too, felt/feel guilty although I know it is what is best for him. Try your best to keep people out of your business because most of them that are complaining are not going to do anything to help you. You are doing the right thing because only YOU know what goes on. Prayers to you and hang in there!!
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Fawnby May 24, 2024
Well, I'm beginning to see that the caregivers are part of the problem. The un-caregivers have no idea what we go through, and we'd all probably agree that they don't. We need to do more PR on our behalf.

So many people I know have been criticized for putting a relative in memory care. "Memory Care" sounds so mild....mom can't recall where she put her phone, and the toothpaste keeps turning up in the fridge, so her Terrible Daughter sent her to Memory Care instead of keeping her at home. Shame on Daughter!

But those things are like one-tenth of the story. Mom also poops in her dresser drawer, walks around naked when the cable guy is in the house, lets loose with shocking expletives to her toddler grandkids. Common decency doesn't allow us to spread the word about mom eating her arthritis gel or chewing on centipedes.

Cousin Minnehaha takes offense that poor auntie is now locked down in Memory Care, which she thinks is a terrible place full of ogres and torturers, when auntie only has "mild dementia" (IMO there is no such thing) and just misplaces her phone now and then.

If you're a caregiver, seriously consider telling would-be critics exactly what dear mom does. They might be more understanding and helpful. We caregivers are prone to suffering in silence way too much.
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Hang in there! You know that its the right thing, its going to be tough to do and your Mom is going to make it a challenge. Try to stick to your guns
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Reply to strugglinson
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It might be a good idea when our loved ones start doing the things that cause them to be placed for their own good, we started talking about those behaviors to everyone and sundry. Instead we keep quiet and want to protect mama’s privacy.

We might get more support from family and community if conversations went something like this: Neighbor - “How’s your mama? I haven’t seen her out and about for a while.” Us - “Well, today she didn’t get to the bathroom on time because she sometimes forgets where it is. She got her pants down and then had explosive diarrhea, so I cleaned her up, gave her a knockout pill to stop her crying, and spent three hours cleaning her clothes, the floor and the wall right down into the baseboards. Do you know anything that will get rid of the stink?”

If they don’t know, they won’t unless you tell them.
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Yes.
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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You’re doing your best. Tell people less
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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As said, your Mom was able to "showtime". Ask her doctor if you could have some anxiety pills for her for the day she goes to MC.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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I don't think it's guilt,call it defeated,can't win no matter how hard you try. You obviously know that you are unable to care for her and are smart enough to know that!!! It shouldn't matter to anyone else because they're not the caregiver! You're doing exactly what you need to do, for both her and you.
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Kwiemer May 24, 2024
Yep
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You are doing the right thing, Don't doubt your decisions. I know it's hard accompanying your parent along their inevitable decline and doubts creep in. But know that you are doing what is necessary and and also kind and caring for her and for you (((((((hugs))))))).
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Reply to golden23
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You are in the trenches day in and day out. You know exactly was going on and you have her best interests at heart.
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lealonnie1 May 24, 2024
Plus, it's not like our loved one is dropped off in AL/MC and our troubles are over! That's a joke. There's a million things we STILL have to do for them while they're there! About all we can do once they move is sleep...if we put the phone on silent!
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I'm sorry that you are experiencing self doubt, but I am so pleased to read that you are doing absolutely the right thing. Good for you!
Please know that we are all rooting for you :)
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Reply to MiaMoor
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Please do not second guess your well thought out decision. Neighbors cannot tell in one visit what's going on all day. Mom is show timing. Kind of like when you are yelling at the kids, and you answer the door at your house and put a smile on to save face.
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