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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Having tried to keep both my mother and MIL at home, as long as possible, I know a couple of things they changed in their homes. A walk in shower was a necessity. That helped a lot. A house cleaner and a bath aid, became necessary. (Most elderly don't want anyone else in the house, though.)
Doorways that would accommodate a walker and then, a wheel chair, where changes that they made. Oh, and a ramp into the house.
My Mother was always cold. she wanted the heat cranked up and no A/C, ever. So, there were additional utility bills.
My MIL liked to get up at 5AM and clank around in my kitchen, that was maddening, every day.
Good luck. There are books you can read on the subject.
Develop a written plan with a lawyer about what you expect her to pay you. Talk to her MD about what changes need to be done to bathrooms and stairs. There is no funding for that, so decide who pays for what. Understand now that she will be anxious about moving and may resent not being in charge of the kitchen. She will be bored, so make sure she has a social outlet either with friends or the senior center. Do not give up your own routines or social circles or YOU will be the one anxious and depressed.
The biggest question is if you and your mother get along well. I read that she has incontinence and wondered if that was her only problem. Incontinence goes with so many illnesses and infirmities. Incontinence by itself can be inconvenient, but with other problems, it becomes more difficult to manage. If her only problem is incontinence, you may not have to do much to make your house elder friendly.
We need a lot more information to be able to answer your question very well. If you have a bedroom for her with furniture she likes and if you know you can get along, I don't see a problem.
You should sit down and talk to your doctor about your plans. Caregiving is 24/7 for who knows how long and it is most important that you take care of yourself first. Then take Mom for current evaluation and get a feel for what is ahead. It is a wonderful thing to do but you must be prepared for all possibilities and that includes your own wellbeing.
I would advise you to skim through the posts as much as you can. No need to read every word, but pay attention to the questions that people are asking and then think about your own family dynamics and how would you/them handle the various situations. Remember that you will make mistakes and that is okay. I admire you for doing this and best of luck to you.
Quite frankly, I do not think it is a good idea in most cases. But in your case it might be okay. Just be prepared. I do not know what you should do, but I would not quit the job outside the home.
Where does she live right now and why do you want to move her? Do you have durable and medical POA for her? If not, you need those soon!
I think first of all, you need to evaluate yourself and your situation health wise both mentally and physically -plus financially for this is a major decision which will involve not only her care for right now but also for whatever develops?
Are you up to the challenge?
How old is she? How much care dose she need and how close is she to needing 24/7 care for that will come at some point? Does she have dementia or Alzheimer's or is it just stating?
Do you have a plan for when 24/7 care is needed.
Are you working? Will you have to stop work and give up not only income and building up social security etc. toward your own retirement, but also your own health insurance
Does your mother have financial assets to pay for extra help in the future.
What if any mobility issues does your mother have than might mean modifying your house?
Sorry that I don't have any answers, but I think these are some important questions to wrestle with.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Doorways that would accommodate a walker and then, a wheel chair, where changes that they made. Oh, and a ramp into the house.
My Mother was always cold. she wanted the heat cranked up and no A/C, ever. So, there were additional utility bills.
My MIL liked to get up at 5AM and clank around in my kitchen, that was maddening, every day.
Good luck. There are books you can read on the subject.
Talk to her MD about what changes need to be done to bathrooms and stairs. There is no funding for that, so decide who pays for what.
Understand now that she will be anxious about moving and may resent not being in charge of the kitchen. She will be bored, so make sure she has a social outlet either with friends or the senior center. Do not give up your own routines or social circles or YOU will be the one anxious and depressed.
We need a lot more information to be able to answer your question very well. If you have a bedroom for her with furniture she likes and if you know you can get along, I don't see a problem.
I think first of all, you need to evaluate yourself and your situation health wise both mentally and physically -plus financially for this is a major decision which will involve not only her care for right now but also for whatever develops?
Are you up to the challenge?
How old is she? How much care dose she need and how close is she to needing 24/7 care for that will come at some point? Does she have dementia or Alzheimer's or is it just stating?
Do you have a plan for when 24/7 care is needed.
Are you working? Will you have to stop work and give up not only income and building up social security etc. toward your own retirement, but also your own health insurance
Does your mother have financial assets to pay for extra help in the future.
What if any mobility issues does your mother have than might mean modifying your house?
Sorry that I don't have any answers, but I think these are some important questions to wrestle with.
Good luck and keep in touch.